Hati pada Hak-haknya

Kebelakangan ini terdetik di hati kerunsingan terhadap soal ummah yang lebih dekat dengan diri ini. Tertangguh sebentar niat untuk summarizekan apa yang diperolehi daripada Program Pengenalan Islam yang wajib buat kami.

Jiran

Pernah sekali, terpaksa menebalkan muka meminta 'am sebelah untuk bercakap dengan mak cik Toshiba yang tak faham-faham bila aku bagi direction ke imarah kami.

Malu, sebab tak pernah bercakap dengan mereka. Tiba-tiba sahaja meminta pertolongan.

Pernah sekali, paip di hadapan imarah kami bocor dan membanjiri imarah yang bertentangan. Jiran marah dan minta diselesaikan segera.

Dejected, sebab abang senior tak angkat telefon.

Elevated, sebab ikhwah sebatch bagi pendapat yang boleh dipakai.

Bangga, sebab ada dua kawan yang temankan untuk bercakap dengan jiran-jiran tersebut.

Lega, sebab semuanya selesai dengan segera.

Agak kecewa dengan diri kerana tidak bergaul sangat dengan jiran setempat. Bukan tidak mahu, tetapi kekangan bahasa dan keselamatan menjurangkan niat tersebut.

Sememangnya hanya alasan yang dapat diberikan. Nak seribu daya, tak nak seribu dalih.

Pernah meminta pendapat ketua batch. Budak lelaki, mungkin lebih mudah bagi mereka.

If it's going to be, it's up to me.

Sekarang sudah mula memberi salam kepada 'am yang sering duduk dihadapan lorong sejak sebulan yang lalu.

Harap dapat terus menunaikan hak-hak kepada jiran.

Rakan sebaya

Pernah sekali, terasa perit hati kerana tak tahu nak call siapa untuk minta tolong.

Pernah sekali, terasa gusar sepanjang perjalanan; bimbang tertembung dengan senior dan dimarahi kerana berjalan tanpa teman.

"I am not friendly, thus I appreciate the minute cluster of friends I have."

Itu kenyataan yang saya buat di profile Friendster. Sekarang, ia membuatkan saya berfikir semula siapakah the minute cluster of friends I have.

I... I think I left them all, somewhere.

Mungkin saya tidak menghargai mereka. Mungkin saya terlalu tidak mahu menyusahkan mereka.

Mungkin saya cuma menganggap mereka teman ketika suka sahaja.

Sememangnya saya tiada masalah untuk menolong sesiapa. Even to the most tedious task, I'll help them if they ask for my favor.

Tapi, siapakah yang saya cari andai ada perkara yang perlu diselesaikan?

Harap dapat dilembutkan hati untuk menunaikan hak-hak sebagai seorang sahabat.

Ikhtilat

Semalam, saya amat bersyukur kerana saya berada bersama mereka.

Amat bersyukur kerana diberkati dengan pengetahuan dan pemahaman untuk mengamalkan pergaulan mengikut ciri yang dibenarkan.

Amat bersyukur kerana hati ini masih lagi dijaga.

Amat bersyukur kerana ada kekuatan untuk menegur on the spot.

Amat bersyukur kerana teguran diterima.

Mama pesan, fokuskan pada diri dan bantulah yang lain.

Harap hati-hati ini akan terus berpaut pada agamaNya.

p/s: Mahu menulis on senior. Lain kali la.

13 Dec: Finuu Tickles Us Pink

I walked home today, as usual.

Happiness level: 7/10

Passed in front of the bakery and smelt something sweet.

My salivary gland was kicked to overdrive.

Turned around towards the shop. Halted momentarily. Walked away from said bakery while counting the cash in my purse.

Exactly LE 2 was left. I smiled gailily.

Happiness level: 8.5/10

Walked back towards the bakery.

"Assalamualaikum, sir. Can I have LE 2 of finuu, please?"

He smiled and nodded. Took a dozen of finuu from the shelf. Handed to one grinning Atiqah.

I walked out of the bakery after expressing my gratitude. Restraining myself from jumping with a whoop.

Happiness level: 10/10

Bukankah awak sudah berjanji tidak mahu membeli finuu lagi?
Saya masih ingat janji manis awak dulu.
-Rodhi-

Resumed my journey back home with extra bounce in every step. Turning the corner towards our imarah.

Suddenly...

"Dear miss, can give me one of your finuu?"

Huh? I turned towards the voice. It was a homeless hagah by the street.

"You would like one?" I asked her with a genuine smile.

She nodded.

I opened my shantoh and gave her one.

"Shukran."

"No problem."

And I resumed the journey back home, one less finuu in hand. Bouncier steps.

Happiness level: Endless.

p/s: Small gesture tickles Atiqah pink.

2 Aug: Cocky and Stubborn

I went to meet Ustazah Fatahiyah last Friday to settle my affair with the MEP dinner and sort out JPA students' BTN letters. It was quite a long wait at her office. I had my share of staring at each and every one of her souvenir keychain hanging around her office.

Shamirul later came to hand in his Introduction to Islam and Medicine assignment. I grinned; reminded I haven't started on mine yet.

He stayed back and chatted. Boy, was he talkative.

Somehow, in between his endless chatters, I managed to spill, "I like being alone in public. It's naturally tranquiling."

"But if you're alone, how can people help you if you have problem?" He and ustazah sort of said.

"I'll manage."

Boy, was I cocky.

I don't think I'm a loner, nor am I in deep problem or something. I just... I like to be alone.

When I feel like being in company, I'll drag myself in. As simple as that.

It's not good, is it? I'm adding more reasons to the list of 'Why Atiqah Should be Kicked.'

"Mind giving me a good thump?"

Aslmwbt, semua.

Sekarang sedang dilanda a series of penyakit.

Hidung sedang tersumbat sekarang. Ditambah dengan angin yang berderu penuh kesejukan dan debu yang melayang-layang.

Selingan: Rasanya kan, blog ni penuh dengan ulasan mengenai saya yang tersumbat hidungnya. Haish.

Teringin nak pakai mafla. Tapi corak yang saya nak dah habis masa saya nak beli.

Dasar perempuan. Corak yang nak dah habis, beli la yang lain. Ni dah jadi keperluan dah ni. Nak kene betul.

Selingan: Bagi Salahuddin Al-Ayubi yang amat pemurah, duit dan debu itu lebih kurang sama je.

Sampaikan bendahari dia terpaksa tak bagitahu jumlah simpanan perbendaharaan negara yang sebenarnya kepada dia, in case dia dermakan duit tu and kegunaan waktu kecemasan tak ada.

Maaf, hidung. Nampaknya cuaca di Mesir ini tidak menyebelahi awak.

Selain itu, saya juga diserang chronic laziness.

Yes, chronic. Not acute. Kalau acute okay jugak. Amat merisaukan la.

Alhamdulillah, saya sentiasa fokus dalam kelas. Kalau dekat dalam universiti, rajin je baca buku lectures. On the way back ke rumah, senyap sepanjang perjalanan dengan minda yang ligat recall and rewind apa yang dah dipelajari.

Amat ligat, sampai tak sedar berjalan tanpa teman disisi.

Selingan: It is dangerous walking alone. Please don't try this at home. Oh, the hypocrite in me.

Sampai je imarah kami, a whole new dimension fall upon me. And a new me is born.

Unfortunately, that new me is darn lazy.

Lazy as in, kaslanah muut nak baca buku. Sentuh pun tak.

Atiqah, kamu amik medic ke apa ni???

Huh. Bagus betul kalau Fatimah ada sekarang. Boleh dia tolong hempuk/sepak kan, bagi rajin sikit.

Doakan cepat sembuh, ye. I can always tolerate that runny nose, but laziness? I just don't see me surviving long in such circumstance.

Syafakillah, ya Atiqah. Robbuna ma'aki.

p/s: Tanggungjawab jauh lebih banyak daripada masa. So what the hell are you doing now?

Harapan dalam Pengorbanan

Oh. Hari ini sudah 10 Zulhijjah. Salam Aidiladha, semua. Kullu 'am wa antum bilkhair. Semoga kita terus mantap bermujahadah dan berkorban fi sabilillah dalam style masing-masing.

Andai anda seorang pelajar, teruskan berkorban masa dan tenaga menuju ke majlis ilmu itu. Walaupun ianya sekadar liqa' yang kecil sahaja, ianya still majlis ilmu. Salah satu dari taman syurga.

Dinaungi malaikat. Diberkati suasananya. Insya-Allah mendapat keberkatan dan pahala darinya.

Maka ikhlaskan niat lillah, kerana keberkatan dariNya lebih diingini bagi memastikan kejayaan dalam perjuangan. Jangan lupa adab majlis ye, sahabat sekalian.

Selingan: Belakang ana ada Ira Sahri, diimport khas dari Jordan. Dia sedang MENARIK RAMBUT ANA! LEPASKAN!!!

"Tidur sini!" Katanya sambil menarik-narik. "Tidur sini tak?"

"Ye, ye!" Nehi, ana tewas!

Maka malam ini, ana tidur di Baitul Hanan. Pasni nak balik rumah amik bantal and lihaf.

Kepala ana sedang berdenyut-denyut.

Teruskan berkorban perasaan rindukan mama, papa serta kerabat-kerabat tercinta di Malaysia dan tumpukan pada usaha pengislahan dan study.

Teruskan berkorban meninggalkan manga-manga dan anime-anime yang menarik itu dan capailah kitab Riyadhus Solihin atau Histology [Exam midterm 20hb ni!].

Selingan: Wah, daku rindukan Chi!

Teruskan berkorban mengetepikan rasa penat itu dan bantulah rakan-rakan yang berhempas-pulas dengan pintu imarah mahupun paip sinki dapur yang masih bocor.

Teruskan usaha bersabar dengan kerenah pak-pak Arab yang perlu memantapkan lagi penghayatan pada Surah Al-Asr serta jiran-jiran yang perlu lebih pemahaman pada kalimah "An-nazofatum minal iiman".

Tidak dilupakan, kerenah senior yang sering membuli.

Selingan: Budak, ada dua sebab why female constitute the most of population dalam neraka.

Satu, banyak mengeluh. Dua, tak dengar cakap suami.

Kamu ni, nak mengeluh lagi ke?

Insya-Allah, ujian yang sedikit hanya sekadar dugaan dari Allah bagi meningkat iman sendiri dan darjat ketakwaan disisiNya.

Teruskan berkorban nus geneh itu demi senyuman manis mak-cik mak-cik yang menjual tisu di jalanan. Semoga hari mereka diberkati, dan semoga kesenangan menanti dalam pelajaran hari ini.

Teruskan berkorban melayan kerenah Ira yang kebudak-budakan itu. Nanti dia balik Jordan, sendiri juga yang teringatkan dia.

Kerana pengorbanan yang berlandaskan iman dan taqwa akan menatijahkan butiran kejayaan yang manis. Pengorbanan hanya sedikit berbanding kejayaan yang terbaik bagi diri sendiri juga.

Not just here, but thereafter as well.

Bahagia dunia, akhirat syurga.
-Dr. Noordin Darus, Gerak Keusahawanan Mesir 2008-

Just one drop of sabar for the sweetest success. Now that's what I call the best investment ever.

p/s: Pengorbanan manifestasi kehambaan.

Dan lembu itu...

Disclaimer: This post is related to my life as an immatured and naive girl. Readers' discretion is advised. Oh, and the title suits the post. Now leave this blog for something more productive.

Nak gigit kepala orang sekarang ni.

Specifically, nak gigit kepala mereka berdua. Okay, mungkin seorang sahaja.

Kenapa? Sebab saya dibuli.

Dua kali dalam tempoh dua jam. Oleh orang yang sama pulak tu.

Membakar usaha selama hampir seminggu.

Sabar, Atiqah. [2 : 286]

Huh. Tengah penat sekarang. Baru selesai usrah.

Tak larat nak balik rumah, maka tidur di sini sahaja.

Nota Anat tak revise lagi. Physio pun.

Atiqah, awak sedang merungut.

Ye, saya tahu.

Saya tidak mahu think twice on menjadi seorang yang baik, tapi mungkin I should learn how to say 'no'.

At least for once.

Sabar, Atiqah.

-Respecting senior[s] and struggling to prove so.-

p/s: Berhenti jadi budak yang manja!

Atiqah [Raksasa] yang Comel

What Your Cute Monster Says About You

You are a deep, thoughtful, down to earth person. You don't put much stock in appearances. You are never superficial or flippant. You take time in life to study, learn, and get to know people well. You inner demon is laziness. You can get so caught up in your own world that you neglect everything around you. People think you're cute because you're intelligent. Your wit and wisdom are charming.

The Cute Monster Test

Surat kepada Ketua Imarah 11

Dur xx, Imarah 20,
Haret Sayyeda Zainab,
Sayyeda Zainab,
Cairo, EGYPT

29 November 2008

Assalamualaikum wbt, cik ketua imarah.

Sihat? Ana harap anti sihat dan terus berusaha melangkah kehadapan dengan penuh kesungguhan dan keceriaan. Ana sekarang sedang sejuk, tapi salah sendiri sebab malas beli dhifayah. Haha.

... Baiklah, ana tahu. Small talk yang membosankan hanya akan di skip, kan. Ana straight to the point je lah.

Sebenarnya, nak ucap terima kasih sebab bersusah payah pegang jawatan yang membosankan ini. Sudahlah anti kena balancekan kehidupan pelajar dengan kemelut seorang ketua imarah, si Bahiran juga dah letak anti jadi Biro Perumahan.

Anti sabar je la, ye. Apa-apa, contact ana. Nanti ana tolong.

Kadang-kadang, ana ada terdengar juga anti kene bebel dengan budak imarah sebab banyak benda tentang imarah kita tak settle lagi. Contoh paling ketara adalah isu line telefon yang tak masuk-masuk (despite dah dipasang) dan internet yang masih tidak dipasang.

Telan je la, ye. Mungkin diorang tak tahu yang anti dah cuba yang sedaya mungkin. Mungkin diorang tak faham bukannya senang nak deal dengan orang Arab ni.

Asal kene bebel je, mesti anti diam. Ana ucapkan tahniah; nampaknya kita sama-sama faham dengan hadith Rasulullah:

من كان يؤمن بلله واليوم الأخر فليقل خير او ليسكت

Kadang-kadang anti nampak ceria je. Senyum entah pape. Bila ditanya, anti akan mengiyakan kalau ana kata anti teringatkan si dia.

Yang sebenarnya, mesti sebab anti tak nak kitorang asyik kacau anti, kan? Kalau anti menzahirkan keserabutan, mesti kitorang samada tambahkan keserabutan anti atau beria-ria nak bantu.

Both of which you despise, ne?

Ana harap, anti akan menambah keikhlasan dalam senyuman. The only time I could see you smiling sincerely was when you were out walking alone. Or any time you were alone.

Erm, ana tegur sikit, boleh?

Anti kadang-kadang lambat balik imarah, walaupun anti selalu laju je jalan keluar dari pagar gami'ah. Anti sengaja berjalan perlahan-lahan ke? Atau anti penat? Lain kali, kita naik teksi sekali. Tiga geneh je pun.

Kalau balik pun, selalu tak ada di bilik. Anti pergi mana? Sutuh ke? Mish ma'ul kidah... Sutuh amat sejuk.

Handphone pun selalu ditinggalkan di bilik.

Anti hanya charge battery bila dah flat je. Ana dengar hari tu, senior risau sebab anti tak dapat dihubungi. Dia ingat ada apa-apa terjadi masa pak cik Arab tu datang rumah anti.

Niat anti tak nak susahkan senior, tapi nampaknya, anti merisaukan mereka lagi, adalah.

Entah apa yang anti fikirkan. Best sangat ke isolatekan diri dari jama'ah?

But then again, Rasulullah pun mencari ketenangan jauh dari kelompok masyarakat.

Tapi anti tu perempuan! Bahaya. Ana nak teman, anti tak nak. Ke nak ana carikan mushrif tetap untuk anti? PERUBATAN ada je Unit Bait Muslim.

*melarikan diri dari lemparan scalpel beracun anti*

Jangan larikan diri. Tiada istilah putus asa dalam kamus hidup kita, bukan kah begitu?

Dan janganlah kamu berputus asa dari rahmat serta pertolongan Allah. Sesungguhnya tidak berputus asa dari rahmat dan pertolongan Allah itu melainkan kaum yang kafir.
(Yusuf : 87)

I wish you all the best, all the rahmah and blessing of His. Ana harapkan anti terus cekal dan tidak luntur dek a small thorn on your rosy path.

Adakah kamu menyangka bahawa kamu akan masuk syurga pada hal kamu belum didatangi ujian seperti yang dialami oleh orang dahulu. Mereka ditimpa kepapaan, penyakit dan ketakutan sehingga berkatalah rasul dan orang yang beriman bersamanya : “Bilakah akan datang pertolongan Allah?” Ketahuilah sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah sangat dekat.
(Al-Baqarah : 214)

Semoga diri terus mantap. Take care, wassalam.

Yours sincerely,
Budak Imarah 11

p/s: Pasal shovel tu, tanya la senior ikhwah. Or tanya Rahman. Kalu dia tak nak tolong, report kat abang anti. Apa susah.

*kali ini, melarikan diri dari lemparan scalpel-scalpel beracun anti*

Warkah Rindu buat Kamu

Di kala malam yang dingin ini, angin sejuk Mesir telah membekukan otak saya, sekaligus mengaktifkan secara hyper aktiviti cervical cortex saya.

Maka saya ada pengakuan emosi yang perlu diterjemahkan demi mengelakkannya dari terus menyerabutkan fikiran ini.

Saya lapar. Walaupun dah makan malam yang sedap (telur sweet sour dan sup sayur... tak mungkin tak tambah), meratah sebungkus Tiger dan seketul Molto chocolate, saya masih lapar.

Perlukah saya meratah lagi biskut Tiger itu? Nampaknya, esok terpaksa beli finuu LE3.

Selingan: Saya tak suka buah zaitun.

Saya juga sejuk. Baiklah, salah sendiri sebab tak menambah jumlah lapisan pakaian.

Saya rindukan mama saya.

Saya rindukan papa saya.

Aduh, saya terasa macam seorang budak kecil di sini.

Saya rindukan guru saya. Akhirnya saya menghantar offline message kepada dia semalam menyatakan kerinduan.

Saya rindukan abang saya. Saya dah biasa ada abang, tetapi abang saya tiada di Mesir. Dah lama tak gaduh dengan dia.

Huh.

Duduk di sini mengajar saya lebih menghargai mereka yang saya ada.

Baiklah. Pengakuan dah dibuat. Sila jangan membuli saya berkenaan apa yang sudah ditulis.

Jom sambung study.

p/s: Rindukan keropok.

'Abid

Mood tak tenang. Iman terasa merudum.

Mungkin sebab salah makan kot. Ikan masak kicap tadi terasa semacam. Ara, aku buat lawak je. Ko masak memang sedap.

Menghadap buku Physio. Membaca tanpa sebarang input.

Apa ni?

Maka pelajaran tanpa kualiti itu dihentikan dan input yang lain dicari.

Mencapai al-Quran.

Jika tidak mampu menjadi seorang 'alim, maka jadilah seorang 'abid.

Ukhuwwah Beras

Pagi ini, macam biasa, nak masak bubur. Potong kacang buncis, carrot dan ayam.

Semua dah sedia. Perencah sup sayur sudah dicuba-rasa dan bersedia untuk dituangkan ke dalam periuk nasi nanti.

Baiklah, bersedia menghadapi air paip yang sejuk. Lipat lengan baju anda! Mari membasuh beras!

Mencari beras di tempat biasa di tepi rak.

Eh? Feen?

"Radhi. Ooo Radhi. Beras pergi mana?"

Radhi menyahut. "Alamak! Lupa nak bagitau awak. Beras dah habis la."

-___-'' "Boleh ke masak bubur kalu tak de beras?

Maka saya pun melangkah dengan penuh bersemangat memanjat tangga ke tingkat dua.

"Assalamualaikum~ Korang, pinjam beras."

"Beras ada ke?" Amar yang sedang mengemop menyoal Nasywa.

"Ada, ada. Amik la."

"Shukran!"

Maka bubur pun selamat dimasak dengan jayanya. Menjamu ahli biit dan Bad dan Nisa' yang datang jauh dari Mounira dan Maniyal.

Saya pernah dinasihati pada zaman purba yang lampau dengan, "Kita ada jemaah yang besar, so gunakan sebaik-baiknya..."

Terima kasih. Saya sedang berusaha menghayati dan mengamalkan nasihat tersebut.

Ukhuwah pun dapat dikukuhkan sambil-sambil tu, kan?

Berjalan, Bermusafir.

"Pagi-pagi pergi kelas naik ape?" Abang itu bertanya pada aku.

"Naik kaki je."

"Kenapa tak naik teksi atau tremco? Ade je, kan?"

"Exercise pagi-pagi."

Dan dia ketawa. "Bagus nye, budak-budak tahun satu."

"Terima kasih." Aku sedar, kami memang amat mantap pun.

Aku suka berjalan di pagi hari. Ya. Ianya menyeronokkan.

Mengulangi mathurat sepanjang perjalanan.

Mengambil masa memerhati geografi Mesir.

Melihat keindahan langit ciptaanNya.

Senyum dan ucapan salam kepada mak cik-mak cik di jalanan.

Menghidu bau 'ish yang masih panas.

Menyegarkan. Sedikit sebanyak menghilangkan keserabutan.

Dan mereka bertanya mengapa aku suka berjalan bersendirian.

Jika berjalan dengan mantap dan penuh semangat, dalam 20 minit akan sampai Kasr el-Ainy Medical School. Biasanya velocity akan dikurangkan di atas jambatan, sebab nak tenung Cairo Tower nun lateral di sebelah kanan.

Semoga nikmat iman dan kesihatan ini berkekalan.

p/s: Aku penat sebenarnya. Aku rindukan basikal aku.

Things Supposed to Be

Tanggungjawab yang diberikan adalah amanah dari yang orang lain, kan?

Ianya tanda kita dihormati dan dipercayai oleh mereka, kan? Kalau tak, takkan mereka nak amanatkan sesuatu pada kita, kan?

Sepatutnya diterima dengan hati yang terbuka dan dilaksanakan dengan penuh ihsan, kan?

Rasulullah sendiri pun mahukan umatnya bersikap ihsan dalam setiap perkara, kan?

Kalau terasa berat, sepatutnya dianggap sebagai satu cabaran dan titik tolak bagi memajukan diri sendiri, kan?

Kalau terasa berat, sepatutnya luahkan kepada sesiapa, kan?

Sepatutnya minta tolong, kan?

Sepatutnya terus tabah, sabar dan berusaha, kan?

Sepatutnya terus senyum, kan?

Sepatutnya berjalan maju ke hadapan dengan langkah yang penuh bersemangat, kan?

Tak sepatutnya berputus asa, kan?

Tak sepatutnya distancekan diri dari mereka, kan?

Tak sepatutnya malas jawab telefon, kan?

Tak sepatutnya menyampah dengan mereka, kan?

Tak sepatutnya update blog menyatakan keserabutan, kan?

Kalau betul-betul tak larat, sepatutnya stop je, kan?

Serahkan kembali amanah yang diberikan, kan?

Hidup tak sepatutnya seserabut ini, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh merenung langit tanpa sebarang di hati melainkan kekaguman tak terhingga padaNya, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh duduk di bawah pokok dan tak buat apa-apa tanpa diganggu, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh tersengih melihat gelagat Nada mengejar kawan-kawannya, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh duduk di balkoni dan memerhatikan daun di pokok bergoyang dengan selesa, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh terus berjalan dengan hati yang bersemangat, kan?

Sepatutnya boleh terus berlari dengan hati yang girang, kan?

Sepatutnya...

Sepatutnya...

Sepatutnya...

Sepatutnya boleh menjadi diri sendiri, kan?

Egypt in Sentences

Seriously, I really wanted to update on life in Egypt. It's just, there's so much to say. And I owe my family one of these, too.

Okay, I admit to my laziness.

Life is okay here. Am still living and learning.

Struggling to increase the amount of ibadah.

Loving the back alleys of Sayyeda Zainab.

Enjoying every second in the bus.

Liking the language. And the people on the bus.

Really wanted to strangle that old geezer selling tissues by the bridge.

Loving the Best apple juice.

Liking ruz billaban.

Tolerating the dusty road.

Irritated with some of ikhwah of the same batch.

Focusing on study.

Chasing cats.

Enjoying the thrilling road-crossing experience.

Cooking day by day.

Appreciating my family day by day.

Missing keropok and all Malaysia has to offer.

Slurping the cold water that tasted like tap water. [It is, by the way.]

Some more studying.

Doing laundry.

Carefully drying them without making them dusty again.

Ironing clothes before classes.

Tolerating the noisy classmates.

Loving my family. Friends at home. At Brighton.

Struggling like hell to not think of someone.

Being eaten inside out.

Wanting to cry and hit myself hard because of the two above stated.

Really hoping for His guidance, forgiveness, rahmat and everything He is always offering.

Struggling to be better. Spiritually. Emotionally.

Being stronger day by day.

Life is still life, no matter where. Egypt is still His land. With optimism, I'm sure ease will come my way.

Fainna maal 'usri yusra. Inna maal 'usri yusra. - Al-Insyirah:4-5

Ini Kami

Baiklah, ini gambar keluarga kami pada 1 Syawal 1429.

Duduk di atas sofa dari kiri adalah: Mak Lang, Mama, Papa meriba Hakim, Mira.
Duduk di lantai dari kiri: Yaya, Atiqah, Harith, Along, Hazim.

Kita mulakan satu persatu.

Mak Lang atau nama glamournya Zan bt Amir adalah sepupu kepada Mama. Berusia agak tua. Suaminya sudah meninggal dan anak-anak tirinya amat-amat besar serta mempunyai keluarga sendiri.

Mak Lang menetap bersama kami dan dibuli Hakim apabila kami semua ke sekolah/kerja/Egypt.

Mama atau nama sebenarnya tidak boleh didedahkan atas sebab-sebab keselamatan negara adalah Unit Manager di Hospital Pakar Perdana. Itu hanya secara zahirnya.

Sebenarnya jawatan dia jauh lebih besar, iaitu Timbalan Ketua Keluarga. Juga merupakan Menteri Dapur.

Berusia... nehi, ini rahsia negara.

Papa atau nama sebenarnya turut tidak boleh didedahkan atas sebab-sebab keselamatan negara. Bertindak sepenuh masa sebagai Ketua Keluarga dan meliputi portfolio-portfolio penting seperti Menteri Pertahanan, Menteri Kewangan, Menteri Kesihatan dan lain-lain lagi.

Dia menyamar sebagai Ketua Jabatan Pediatrik di Hospital Raja Perempuan Zainab 2. Akan bersara dalam tiga tahun dan akan terus berkhidmat di hospital yang sama.

Lebih berusia dari saya.

Hakim atau nama sebenarnya Pocoyo adalah the youngest child of the family. Suka membuli dan bercakap sorang-sorang. Suka menonton Playhouse Disney dan minum susu segar dan Pediasure.

Makanan kegemaran adalah apa-apa sahaja yang disuap. Kadang-kadang minta Krabby Patty, tetapi di mana nak cari Krusty Krab? Lautan Pasifik amat luas, tau.

Berusia 4 tahun pada 12 Oktober ini. Tidak bekerja. Unless membuli dikira sebagai satu profession.

Mira atau nama sebenarnya L Lawliet adalah anak ketiga. Menjadi mangsa pembulian abang dan kakaknya sehingga meninggalkan trauma yang teruk, iaitu inability to stand up straight. Sentiasa terbongkok.

Mempunyai taste yang ganjil. Meminati orang yang ganjil. Berkebolehan melayari internet sehingga jam tiga pagi. Suka tidur petang.

Sentiasa menyusahkan. Apa lagi?

Berusia 16 tahun. Kurang berumur dan sememangnya kurang berpengalaman daripada saya.

Yaya atau nama sebenarnya Yahya adalah anak keempat. Bossy. Senang menangis menyebabkannya selalu dibuli Hakim. Seorang yang bijak.

Kadang-kadang suka minta benda bukan-bukan. Selalu beli benda bukan-bukan. Walaupun kuat merepek, dia tetap akan mengikut arahan yang diberikan.

Boleh diharap. Sayangkan ahli keluarganya.

Berusia 8 tahun.

Atiqah or her field name Haru Mitsui bercita-cita membuka kedai sushi di Mesir bernama Mitsui Sushi. Setakat ini, tiada maklumat lanjut yang dapat diperolehi memandangkan failnya dikunci di dalam vault super super duper ketat with access only to those with AAA security level.

Dia juga inginkan handphone baru. Dan penyangkut baju. Dan ubat selsema yang lebih mudah ditelan.

Harith atau nama glamournya... Maaf, tiada nama glamour kerana dia tidak glamour. Suka menjengkelkan saya.

Further information could not be disclosed kerana ana berpaksikan 'Man kaana yu'mim billahi wal yaumul akhir falyakul khoira au liyaskut.'

Berusia 14 tahun. Semoga dia segera matang.

Along atau nama sebenarnya Eduwardo Haido adalah ronnin sesat dari Dinasti Meiji. Bakal bergelar doktor gigi dalam kira-kira tiga tahun lagi.

Baru pulang dari Indonesia dalam pencariannya mencari tudung hitam getah untuk Mama. Seterusnya berhajat untuk ke Mesir bagi misi seterusnya.

Ceh, sebenarnya nak ngintip orang.

Seorang yang tua dan sering membebel. Berusia 20 tahun.

Hazim atau nama sebenarnya Robin of Gotham City adalah anak didik kepada Batman. Berkebolehan gimnastik yang tinggi kerana bekerja di circus sebelum berkecimpung dalam bidang menegakkan keadilan. Baru selesai menentang lawannya pada tahun ini iaitu Urban Pirate for Security and Ransom.

Seorang yang kreatif dan berdaya saing tinggi. Semakin meningkat tinggi dan bertambah amplitude suara.

Suka membuli Hakim dan menyebabkan suasana bertambah gamat. Agak malas dan perlu dipaksa untuk bertugas.

Mempunyai handphone yang hanya digunakan sebagai loceng penggera. Sememangnya seorang yang ganjil.

3 Oct: Mercun on a Syawal

Kami balik Perak pada 2 Syawal. Boleh tahan jumlah kerabat yang ada di sini.

Seperti yang disangka, tiada bunga api. Apatah lagi mercun.

3 Syawal. Iaitu hari ini. Sekarang dah malam, and Chik and the gang baru je sampai. Chik, Chik Na, Syahmi (Abang), Zafira (Yaya a.k.a. Adik), Bibik dan si kementot yang baru dua minggu lahir; Rayyan.

A.k.a, aku tak tahu. Kalu kakak dia dah dapat nickname 'Adik', Rayyan ape? Baby?

Tapi budak itu kecil. Merah jugak mukanya. Berkerut macam orang tua.

"Nampak tak stabil."

"Ape yang tak stabilnye, Ikah?" Chik Na menyoal.

Bajunya hijau. Mitten dia tercabut sebelah. Stokingnye pun. Aku amik topinye dan pakaikan.

Merenung. Aku cabut balik.

"Kecik sangat la, Chik." Aku letak topinya atas meja; nadaku hopeless. "Topi dia pun tak muat."

Ateh bawak penimbang berat tadi. Aku dah kira berat beg cargo aku. Tahniah, 32kg sahaja.

Aku timbang cabin luggage. Okay... 17kg. Gasak r. Aku dah tak tau nak buang ape dah.

Limit aku? Haha, 30kg and 5kg.

Kepulangan Chik membawa bersama sekotak bunga api yang terselit belambak mercun. Kanak-kanak yang tak matang segera melarikan isi kandungan kotak itu ke laman depan.

Mercun sahaja; mereka tak main bunga api.

Aku rembat dua bunga api. Sememangnya aku matang. Sensible. Name it.

Ateh, seperti tahun-tahun sebelumnya, supervised our mercun-lighting session. Eleh, aku tahu dia memang nak main sekali.

Mereka bakar mercun yang bila dinyalakan, berpusing sambil mengeluarkan sparks emits cloud of smoke.

"Woi!" Aku menepis gaya ayam. "Jangan la bakar dekat sangat dengan orang!"

Harith tidak melayan seruan aku. Sememangnya aku tak kan bawak balik plushie unta ke dia nanti.

Mercun yang tadi dibakar dan dibakar. Asap berkepul. Dan berkepul.

Harith bakar sumbu mercun itu dan baling ke langit.

"Aaaahhhh!!!" Aku menepis gaya ayam. Lagi. "Mana dia pergi? Mana dia pergi?"

Dan mercun itu jatuh dua kaki dari aku.

"Jangan baling dekat orang!"

Bunga api aku masih lagi belum dibakar. Aku pandang keliling. Hanya aku, 18, dan Adik, 5, sahaja yang main bunga api.

=.=

"Ateh, ateh!" Syahmi berlari dengan mercun yang kelihatan agak besar. "Bakar yang ni!"

Aku melihat deruan sparks yang keluar dari mercun yang Hazim bakarkan.

Tiba-tiba...

*BOOOM!!*

"Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!" Aku menutup telinga. Dua-dua. Melarikan diri dari sumber letupan di sebelah hujung kiriku.

Ateh, 48, Harith, 14, Hazim, 12, Syahmi, 7 dan Adik stared at me with unexplained expresses on their faces.

"Bahaya! Jangan main mercun yang tu!"

Sekali lagi, aku tidak diendahkan.

Mereka bakar lagi mercun gila itu.

*BOOOM!!*

dan *BOOOM!!*

dan *BOOOM!!*

dan *BOOOM!!*, *BOOOM!!*, *BOOOM!!*

Jantung aku dah laju macam masa aku jumpa dia hari tu.

Menakutkan, tetapi amat mengujakan.

Hazim bakar mercun yang awal-awal tu. Baling ke langit.

Oh. Nehi.

Aku menutup kepala aku. "Mana dia pergi? Mana dia pergi?"

Dan sekali lagi, ia jatuh dua kaki dari aku.

Nak kene ni, nak kene.

Bunga api aku bakar. Aku pegang hulu dia yang paling hujung dan hala dia jauh-jauh. Pejam mata. Paling muka dari kepulan sparks and asap.

Dia dah padam. Aku bakar satu lagi.

Dengan gaya yang sama.

Mercun masih lagi berdentum. Aku masuk rumah.

"Chik, apsal Chik beli ke Syahmi mercun besar gile? Bahaya la."

"Tak pe." Chik Na jawab. "Ayah dia bomba."

... "Adakah itu menjamin keselamatan dari segala bahaya?" Dan aku berlalu untuk membuli Rayyan.

Mercun masih lagi berdentum at the interval of every half minute. Opah aku membebel. Dia terkejut.

Aku keluar.

"Woi korang. Dah la tu main, opah dah terkejut dah."

"Ika urut la belakang opah." Chik aku berkata. Harith terus membakar sumbu mercun.

"Banyak la urut. Korang la patut berhenti main."

"Suruh la opah tutup telinga." Hazim menyarankan. Tersengih dan membuat gaya.

"Kurang ajar kamu." Aku dan atuk ketawa.

Chik kata, "Urut la belakang opah. Yang ni last."

"Okay." Aku caye. Masuk rumah dan dengar ia berdentum.

Opah merungut lagi.

"Tak pe, pah. Chik kata yang tadi tu last."

Sesuku minit kemudian...

*BOOOM!!*

"Woi! Tadi kata last! Penipu betul!"

Student and Brother

I tagged along after dad to the airport to pick up Hadi. He was the last man standing in USIM (lol) after all his friends left home for the upcoming Eidul Fitr.

He was due at 2330 hour, so we arrived ourselves approximately 2320.


While waiting for His Excellency to arrive, I leaned on the cold wall and renamed nearly all the contacts in my handphone.

Hmm. I was never patient enough to wait. Kept glancing around for anything worthwhile to stare at, apart from the opposite wall.

That's when I saw him.

Shorter than me, hair slightly rusty, clad in a pristine white jubah. The one and only Ilham Shah, class monitor of 4 Ikhlas 2008.

The young boy with a fetish for knocking his teachers off with Backstreet Boys' Inconsolable.

"Hey, Ilham!" I called out as the young boy passed in front of me. Okay, so he didn't hear me.

"Ilham!"

He glanced around. His slightly chubby face lit up in a smile.

"Assalamualaikum, Ilham." I held my hand out in a short salute, still practically leaning on the wall. What are you, Atiqah? Some spineless sotong?

"Waalaikumussalam. Bila balik?"

"Lebih kurang minggu lepas."

"Oh. Kitorang baru je balik." True enough, I saw his pride of siblings some distance away.

"Oh."

"Kenapa tak balas mesej?"

"Eh?" I pulled out my handphone. "Tak de dapat pun."

He opened his mouth to continue, but I picked up what he meant. "Mesej Friendster ke? Dah balas lama dah, budak."

He smirked. "Saya bukak Friendster sebulan sekali."

"Bertuah."

We smiled and he ran off towards the entrance.

His Excellency Hadi finally showed up. He remarked something insensitive, to which I rewarded him with a full punch to his right arm for such keen and remarkable observation.

I won't be punching him for quite a while now. It's now or never.

Hoho. I'm such an adorable sister.

Grocery Shopping: Wet Market

I read about these whilst waiting for my brothers' hair to be cut off. Enjoy.

Sayuran
Pilih yang kelihatan baru dan segar. Macam baru dipetik. Tidak tua atau muda sangat. Semestinya tiada bekas gigitan ulat atau berkudis tanda serangan penyakit.

Kubis.
Pilih yang ringan. Jika ianya dibelah, akan nampak rongga-rongga yang besar. Kobis camni biasanya lagi sedap and manis.

Sawi.
Cari yang berbatang halus dan berdaun lebat. Batang besar biasanya pahit.

Tomato.
Ambil yang agak kehijau-hijauan. Yang macam ni biasanya lebih padat and sedap.

Timun batang.
Pilih yang berbatang lurus dan kurang warna hijau gelap di hujungnya. Warnanya yang gelap can be taken as an indication of its bitterness.

Bawang.
Pangkalnya tidak busuk atau lembik. Baunya tidak sepatutnya berubah dan tidak berair di mana-mana bahagian.

Ubi dan keledek.
They're supposed to be lurus.

Ikan.
Ikan yang segar isinya pejal dan insangnya masih merah. Kalau ikan yang fresh gile, insang dia still berdarah, tau. Jangan amik ikan yang insang dia hitam atau hematoma dah muncul.

Kalau ikan yang bersisik, pastikan sisiknya penuh and tak mudah tanggal.

Ayam.
For first-timer, ayam dibeli mengikut jumlah dan bukannya kilo. Unless you're asking for body part.

Ambil ayam yang bersaiz sedang. Elakkan amik ayam yang besar sangat sebab:
- ia mungkin ayam tua yang berdaging tidak sedap.
- lemak je banyak, isi kurang.

Kita nak otot, people!

Nenas.
Nenas yang masak biasanya matanya kurang timbul. Kalau ikut warna, pilih antara tiga ini:
- kuning tua
- kuning keemasan
- kuning kemerahan
Ianya bergantung kepada spesis nenas tu jugak.

Daunnya pulak... kalu tak salah saya ianya mudah tanggal.

Tembikai.
Kulitnya agak licin dan ianya berpangkal gemuk. Dari pangkal sehingga ke hujung, warna kulitnya sepatutnya putih kuning air.


Happy grocery shopping, people!

Pass the Appreciation Baton

Hari ini result rasmi dikeluarkan untuk pelajar-pelajar MEG tajaan pak cik JPA. Result tak rasmi aku dah tahu Rabu baru ni and I only told Akmal, Muhammad and Raihaana of it because they happened to be online when I'm around. Gah.

Pagi-pagi lagi aku dah emailkan ke semua pelajar, sms ke MT dan kelas rep dan buat announcement di group Friendster kami.

Semalam aku tidur lambat untuk synchronize kan email-email budak-budak ini in preparation for sending out 95 emails.

One word. Tedious. I should get myself a personal assistant.

Lepas tu pulak, ada 8 email yang silap dalam simpanan kami. Which adds to the agony. I mean, we should have triple-checked all emails before establishing them in our database.

Database sudah selamat dengan Fahmi. Lega, yang tu aku tak payah isikan dah!

Aku baru balik dari shopping for fresh herbs and gunting rambut budak-budak ni. Hakim amat comel bila dikerat rambut!~

Ehem. Let's not be distracted.

Balik je, aku sambung download dictionary and checked my email. Ada seorang ikhwah balas mass message pagi tadi dengan ucapan syukran awiy ya ukhti..

I was like... touched. Small gesture does tickle me pink.

Spooks

Spoilers, beware!

I was on the award-winning Spooks just now, rerunning the episode where Riff and B's son Alfie was kidnapped.


Since I'm online, I wikied the series and found out Fiona will be gunned down by her Syrian ex-husband and will die in Adam's arms, deteriorating him to a breakdown.

That show is one cruel one.

Whaat? What is wrong with me spoiling myself with advanced details? I mean, at least I'm well-prepared for the future.

Although I am fine with death and am comfortable with the fact that it is a daily occurence, I just don't fancy the idea of killing off characters just like that.

I mean, it's the same rage I felt when Rowling killed off Sirius!

Ehem. Back to our topic.

One of the reason why I am so not looking forward to Fiona's demise is because she and Adam were married. They're the MI5 and they're building a family.

I like stories with happily married couples. At least something's right.

People watch tv for a happily-ending life. If we want real-life drama of frustration and sorrow, I might as well stare at the people hanging out at the mall; completely at loss of their way of life.

Duh.

Anyway, Spooks is an excellent spy drama. Its pace is not as fast as 24 that I got lost midway, nor is it slow as a siput.

Actions and blood uncensored. Controversional presentation and style.

Good mental preparation for the young doctors.

Enter Chef Atiqah

Guess what I did today.


I cooked. Hoho. Which is a rare occurent in the Hanifah household.

Mom helped me as I cooked up the ever famous Nasi Maqlouba. And the kuah bamya.

Quite a feast we had. Hakim ate three times while Harith, Hazim and Mira had two servings each.

I had half plate. I can't bring myself to eat what I cook.

Come on, people. I know you wanted to say wow right now. Come on, say it, say it!

Cooking, my dear fellow, is simple. The key ingredient to a heartening dish is love. As you cook, picture your beloved's happy smile when they have that meal.


I'm sure a cook will be born.

Tag #1 - Books and Learning

I have been tagged. With personal questions. Man, I was like, why would people want to know me? I am far from being interesting.

But then again, I have nothing to declare but my popularity.

So here goes. Fatima, this is for you.

Since marks were not given, I assume each question carries one mark for one answer. I shall not elaborate. Ha. Ha.

1. What's the most important thing in your life?
My life manual and basically everything that I own.

2. What's the last thing you bought with your own money?
Petrol.

3. Where will your dream marriage takes place?
Grandpa's.

4. How long do you think the relationship will last?
Insya-Allah, till Allah call one of us to His side.

5. Are you in love?
Oh, mesti...

6. Where's the last restaurant you had dinner?
The Chicken Rice Shop, Ole-Ole
with these bunch. No, I am not missing them.

7. Name the last book you bought.
Dr. Muhaya's How to Become a Good and Successful Medical Student.

8. Full name, please.
Haru Mitsui. Wanna see my pic?

9. You're fonder of mom or dad?
There is no such thing as prefering between parents.

10. Name someone you would like to meet for the first time in your life.
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. I've some questions for that sir.

11. Christina or Britney?
Atiqah!

12. Do you do your own laundry?
Depends on how diligent I am.

13. Coolest place I wanna go
Library!

14. Hugs or kisses?
Both. Ah, yes, greedy.

15. 8 things I truly adore
Reading
Writing
Works, tasks, assignments, chores, etc
Mama's cooking
White chocolate
Kura-kura
Being myself
Appreciation

16. 7 frequently used words
Serabut...
Senyap r...
Hmm?
Whaat?
Jap jap.
Terima kasih!

17. 7 latest book I've read
Exploring Physics Form 4
Physics Illustrated SPM
Aku Terima Nikahnya (Ustaz Hasrizal)
Introductory Egyptian Arabic (Dr. Naimah Abdullah)
How to become a Good and Successful Medical Student (Dr. Muhaya)
360 Degree Leader (John C. Maxwell)
Ringkasan Ihya' Ulumuddin (Imam Ghazali)

18. 8 songs I can listen to repetitively
It depends on the season, but currently, I can tolerate:-
It's My Life (Bon Jovi) oh yeah!
Won't Go Home Without You (Maroon 5)
Inconsolable (BSB)

L's Theme B (Yoshihisa Hirano)
Life (Yui) this is my ringtone/alarm
God Knows (Aya Hirano)
Setanggi Syurga (Inteam)
Pocoyo's Opening Theme
Three English, three Yabanis, one nasyid, one cartoon... nice.

19. 8 things I learnt last year (2007)
Human management skills.
Human psychology.
Nerd is a compliment.
Immaturity sure is troublesomic.
Don't trust people too much.
Be on your guard.
Amirah has tolerable taste.
Sneakers are fun.

So there you have it. Now where's my prize?

Izinkan Aku Melafazkan Kata

I was in the Perdana V6 with dad driving from home to Eon Service Center (I sent Budu earlier this morning for his medical check-up), listening to IKIM.fm.

Gaily chatting with him, tapping on the dashboard when a new song popped from the stereo.

Okay, I did it again. This song embedded itself among my neurons, thus impairing me from further focusing on my tasks at hand.

What song was it? Setanggi Syurga by Inteam.

Yeah, I know. Vintage already. I sort of like music from the dinosaur age, they're at least better than the crap nowadays on the radio.

At least, my taste has improved. I remember me from the old days; resenting anything related to nasyid except those played by Shoutul Aman.

Percaya kata janjiMu
Kerna ku yakin apa di genggamMu
Keharuman setanggi syurga
Bukan kilauan sebilah belati

Tersiksa jiwa merindu
Bagai terkurung dibasah tengkujuh
Kewangian aroma bunga
Tak menggugah keteguhan iman

Cinta tak pernah terbunggar dan terlebur
Pada redup renung mata yang menipu
Tuntas ku mendaki
Puncak cinta teragung

Izinkan aku melafazkan kata
Bicara hati yang mudah diterjemah
Betapa aku gerun pada teduh untuk bernaung
(Kerna awan itu rapuh)

Bahagia buat mereka
Yang bertemu cinta yang teragung
Yang membawa ke syurga hakiki dan abadi

Dendam tak marak menyala dan membakar
Oleh putih salju yang berguguran
Kerna dosa itu
Lebih hitam dan kelam

Ku anyam rindu menjadi hamparan
Kerna ku pasti adanya pertemuan
Di sana nanti bukti cinta suci dilafazkan
Tak bertemu pengucapan

Percaya kata janjiMu
Kerna ku yakin apa di genggamMu
Keharuman setanggi syurga
Bukan kilauan sebilah belati

Kata janjiMu...
Seharum setanggi syurga

Quite catchy music they had. And illuminating lyrics.

*sigh* This has to be the aftermath of dealing with performance unit from MEP dinner. Now I'm liking nasyid.

What next crazy bug gonna bit me?

Raining

No, I am fine. I just need some wiring.

Or maybe what I need now is some courage.

Honesty is Novelty

I went to SRI Aman just now to pick up Yaya and Hazim. It was crowded as usual, duh, and the kids were late. So I had to park Budu near Aulad Playschool and walked back to SRI to haul them all up.

Mission accomplished. I carried Yaya's elephant bag. As we walked towards the car, I saw Irsyad and Faiq walking towards us, each holding a 30-sen packet containing junks and low-quality robot.

"Teacher!" Faiq waved at me.

"Hah! Faiq!" I smirked at the small boy. "Apa beli mercun masa-masa camni!"

"Bukan mercun la!~"

And the kids ran off towards the school.

We walked pass the stall selling the alleged mercun. Faiq ran back towards us, yelling out his tiny lungs, "Mak cik! Mak cik!"

I spun my head around to look at him. What's up?

Faiq ran into the stall and, still yelling, made his way towards the surprised mak cik. "Mak cik, mak cik, kita tak ingat nak bayar tadi!"

I smiled. Such honest boy, and he's only 8 years old.

I pray for more of Faiq, and blessings for all. Ameen.

Disclaimer: ESTP

I screwed up today. I asked a sensitive question to an acquaintance of mine and she’s not replying. I think I’ve just made her cry.

Which is typical of me. And that fact just made me feel even worse about myself.

Sure, I didn’t mean to hurt her, but I overlooked the sensitivity of the issue, thus asking her was a fatal mistake.

I know I suck at public relationship. I am a Choleric, an ESTP; I do the background ordering and such. I rarely deal directly with people unless to order them around.

Why did I even think of venturing into dealing with commoners when it was crystal that I can hardly do it? Oh, because of the challenge it provides.

I can be as friendly as I want, but can also be as taciturn as can be. I still could not read my own self.

So let the web do the reading for me.

-----

When standing in one place they tend to wriggle rhythmically as if they have a slight electric current running through them.
Yeah, this is true.

Their eyebrows are often asymmetrical.
*grabs a mirror* Eh?

When ESTps want to show their dissatisfaction they frown as if they are angry.
Yeah, we do.

Older ESTps often become puffy and swollen around the eyes.
Am I considered older?! I look like a racoon.

They also have a tendency to squint.
Yes, this is a fact.

ESTps rarely wear eye-catching clothes. ESTps generally prefer to remain in the shadows.
You should see my wardrobe.

When in conversation, ESTps always show self-restraint and tact. They generally interact in an open and friendly manner, always showing positive emotions.

They do not like to openly express their opinions. During interaction ESTps always try to show that they are paying full attention and that they understand their interlocutor very well. They do this with masterful tact and delicacy, therefore gaining other peoples trust very quickly.
But then again, that's why we choose blogging as an expression of our turmoils.

They can pause for long periods of time before replying to questions or statements. This can give the impression that they are assimilating the received information. In situations such as these they usually squint.
I do this all the time.

ESTps are never afraid to show others that they did not understand or do not know something and therefore never hesitate to ask people to repeat or to specify what they said.
Yeah, and this one, too.

ESTps enjoy showing their understanding and like to explain things to others. They always do this slowly and methodically giving simple, practical examples.

They also prefer to have the last word in conversations, concluding the dialogue themselves.

When in confrontation, ESTps quickly focus on their opponents weaknesses, usually destroying them with one perfectly placed phrase. If this opportunity does not manifest itself, they have the skills to provoke the reaction they desire.

ESTps are very slow to anger. And when they do become angered it is very difficult for them to calm down.
Please do not tick me off, because this one is so true.

They like games that require quick thinking and tactics and often win these games as they have great skill misleading and provoking their opponents into making bad moves.

ESTps have cast-iron self-control and nearly always achieve their goals. If required they can step on anyone or anything often ignoring ethics completely if the situation calls for it.

ESTps do not care much how people achieve results. They give others complete independence to choose their own method of working, as they consider the end result to be more important.

ESTps are very tactically minded and know how to adapt to changing situations very quickly. They know how to arrange people according to their abilities and usefulness.

They prefer to adopt an informal and unofficial leadership.

They also do not like doing their own dirty work.
I've bodyguards for this.

ESTps are hard working and extremely persevering people. The more obstacles they meet the more obvious these qualities become.
Aiwah! \(^v^)/

They do not react well to unchallenging situations. They truly come alive in the face of adversity. ESTps are inclined to give ultimatums.

15th Sept: Shop till You Drop

I took a leave from Ustaz Rashid today, since my parents took the day off to take me shopping and banking.

Banking

First stop was HSBC Bank. We met Ms. Lee and dad chatted with her like old buddies while I stared at them with goofy smiles. Off the record, she told us tales of banking in Malaysia and some of the situations in Egypt.

He arranged for my account to be made joint with his, easing me in cases of stolen or lost ATM cards and such. If I'm left stranded, at least someone trustworthy can act on my behalf.

Not really interested in banking, that's why I took up medicine. Dad likes to talk finance with me (with me admitting boredom, to which he laughs understandably) and encourages me to monitor my unit trusts, finance portfolio and read financial related books and mags, instead of the neurones-damaging comics. Which is as exciting as watching my cat yawns.

Afterwards, he went to Takaful whatsit to run a few errands regarding my Takaful Siswa or something like that while me and mom went shopping for Hakim's baju melayu.

We came out of the shop not with a nice pair of baju melayu, but with a nice tudung for me instead.

Never trust girls to go shopping. Even with a list, they'll steer off coast and end up with something else instead.

Then the real deal began. We went to KB Mall in search for my stuffs.

Shopping

Buying bags

I was never good at shopping. I made a lot of mistakes (repetitively) with my purchases that I need to rely on others to give me ideas and such. Which is where my parents step in.

They told me which bag they like, and with a few nods at their reasons of why, I will pronounce my, "Yes, I'll take that bag."

As soon as possible. I can't stand being in a room full of stuffs. I know I'll end up magnunah with all the choices to be made.

So, now, I am the proud owner of a set of Camel Active gold-colored cargo and hand carriage bags.

Buying winter clothes

We went to buy a set of long john for me. The clothes are funny looking. Not haha funny; funny funny. (No, I am not confusing. It's just you not watching Teenage Mutants Ninja Turtles.)

One set is enough, I suppose.

Mom asked me about sweaters.

"I have one. The one I brought home from Shah Alam."

"That one's not really suitable. It won't keep out the cold air. We'll get you a new one."

"But I like the color! Can't I just bring it along?"

"It's your call, but it won't do much trick. Why not you just take Along's jacket? He hadn't given you any souvenirs yet, had he?"

Haha! So there it goes. I shall take ownership of Along's olive jacket. Along, you hear me? Don't play deaf! (or blind, in this case.)

There were thick socks and gloves on sale, too. Dad suggested I buy one, but he did mention it would probably cost less in Egypt.

"At least, I'll take a simple one just to use before I buy a winter one, eh?"

"Sounds good. Choose one."

"This one is double-layered, but this one is single. Which one, papa?"

"Double."

"But the single has cute stripes!"

"Then buy the single one, la."

"Papaaa!"

In the end, I end up with just the long john and a pair of wool socks.

Buying shoes

I wanted a new pair of shoes (haha. Okay, I know I should stop blabbing about shoes.) so we walked to the shoes department, where I fall in love with this Camel Active Hydra shoes!

I slipped into it and it was like, perfect!

Only it was one size too large.

"Excuse me, sir. You have this in 5?"

The guy went to check. He came back later with, "Sorry, 6 is our smallest."

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Nehiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!

I recovered from my shock and left to soothe my aching heart.

Buying pants

"No, mom. I've enough pants at home."

"Sport pants?"

"I used my black slacks when I played futsal."

"You can't use slacks for sports!"

Well, I did. And I have lots of black slacks, so it should not be an issue.

But debating with mom will be lethal on my behalf, so I let her choose a sport pants for me. "Here, try M."

"It's..." I stared at my feet as I held the trousers close to my lower limbs. "Too long."

"Here, S."

Don't. I. Grow?

As I wandered around for the salesperson, I stumbled across this beauty hanging off the rack. Malicious smile. "Mama, can I have this one, too?"

"Sure."

It was a khaki slack.

Buying white shirt

I arrived at the ladies department. Stared at the endless rows of petite clothes. Okay, I am at loss.

This was the first time I shop at the ladies department. Usually I pick up my clothes from my mom's drawer, the gents department (they have cool t-shirts off the racks there) or specialty shops.

I need a white shirt to go with my navy blazer for my departure this 6th October. How do you choose a shirt for blazer?

They're short, for God sake. Who wear such garments?

Mom pointed out, "This one, this one, this one... Oh, this one, too. Now go try them on."

Naturally, I tried them all. Man, I can't believe ladies wear such short clothes. What's wrong with them, anyway? Fancy showing off their gluteals to the world.

Why am I writing like I'm not a female myself?

I'm supposed to take an M, but I asked for an L. Which felt a lot breathable and won't embarrass me had I to take off my blazer.

I hope Egypt will be cool enough to welcome me.

Buying groceries

Took two of each common powder.

Took four of serbuk kunyit. I believe we will do a lot of frying in Egypt.

Passed the rack of instant fried rice without much of a glance. (Nasi goreng is easy... You throw in some garlic, anchovies, veggies, egg, rice, salt, some anchovy cube if you want, and voila!)

Took countless amount of chicken, anchovy and tom yam cube.

Took three of Habhal's sweet soy sauce.

Took four of Kimball's chilli sauce.

Stared at the massive pile.

"Do you think it will be enough?"

"It won't ever be enough. Are you planning on stocking up for one year?"

"Haha~"

"Why so much kicap? Are you planning on eating ayam masak kicap for the rest of six years?"

"Mama, they don't have kicap in Egypt. Better bring some before I run amok out of craving."

"Okay la."

"Besides, ayam masak kicap is easy."

For Atiqah, cooking, theoretically, is easy. Whether it is edible or not is another issue.

Buying kuali

I'm not even sure whether I should be buying one, but I might not have time to go for kuali-hunting in Egypt when I should be hunting for Chik's Harley Davidson.

I took one off the rack. "What do you think of this one, papa?"

"What's it made of?"

"Aluminium. This one's a stainless steel."

"Stainless steel, then. You could get aluminium poisoning from an aluminium wok."

"What?" I nearly dropped my hold of the aluminium wok.

"Don't worry, those are just rare cases. You could buy that one if you like." He stated selamber-ly.

"Papaaa! You can't expect me to buy this one after you told me of aluminium poisoning!"

Mom sort of glared dad. "That is, if the wok is scratched."

"Yeah, but I'm just saying the fact. You could get renal problem from it."

My stomach tightened.

"Aluminium wok is not the primary cause of renal problem."

"Of course."

Mom gave me the aluminium wok and made for the cashier to pay. I heard dad muttered, "Still, aluminium poisoning is one of the causes..."

Is it safe?

Back at home...

I stared at my pile of stuffs. Stared at my giant Camel bag. Okay... now how am I to ensure I'm not exceeding the luggage weight limit?

"Mama, can I borrow your office's bathroom scale?"

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Then how am I to know my luggage's weight?"

"You go to the air port and weigh it." Dad popped out and laugh.

Ha. Ha.

Inevitable Pain

Masalah hati adalah masalah yang amat menyusahkan. Hati adalah organ yang bertanggungjawab terhadap pelbagai jenis tugasan dalam badan kita, primarily in detoxification of toxins and drugs.

Hati juga merupakan organ yang bekerja amat keras, even exceeding that on the heart. Terima kasih, hati. Saya sayangkan awak.

Kalau hati kita ada problem, mesti susah hidup. Toxin tidak dapat disingkirkan dari badan, will accumulate in tissues and organs, leading to death.

Simple, kan?

Hati saya ada problem. Agak lama juga di-diagnose. Kalau ingatan saya baik, sejak 8 Ogos lagi. Lama, kan? Saya pun tak pasti bagaimana saya masih boleh hidup dengan penyakit hati yang kritikal ini. Mesti kerana sokongan dan dorongan orang ramai.

080808. Tarikh yang cantik.

Saya tidak tahu bagaimana nak mengubati penyakit saya ini. Surpressing and keeping the pain to myself will only deteriorate my health, which will be lethal at the end. Though I tolerate pain well, it still doesn't help curb my inability to focus with tasks at hand.

Banyak urusan belum disettlekan. Saya tak nak bazirkan masa saya dwelling in self-pity when I could participate in iman-building activities.

My condition is severe. I keep losing focus. Terkaku kadang-kala di saat buah fikiran saya diperlukan. Terpaksa duduk dan tenangkan diri.

Adakah saya perlukan bantuan? Cukuplah rasanya dengan membaca Al-Quran dan mengingati Allah, sudah pasti hati akan jadi tenang.

Kalau tak tenang juga?

Go for a liver transplant, duh.

p/s:
Dari Abu Abdullah Al-Nu'man bin Basyir r.a. katanya: Aku dengar Rasulullah s.a.w. bersabda: ...Ketahuilah! Bahawa di dalam badan ada seketul daging, apabila ia baik, baiklah badan seluruhnya dan apabila ia rosak, rosaklah sekeliannya. Ketahuilah! Itulah yang dikatakan hati.

8 Sept: Menemui Mereka dengan Pisang

Aku berlalu pulang dari Ole-Ole melalui Bazaar Ramadhan di depan Kolej Cemara. Aku ternampak ramai pelajar berkumpul di tepi gerai buah. The only fruit stall in the vicinity.

Terbau benda. Ternampak benda kuning.

Oh tidak.

Maka aku pun beli pisang itu kerana tergoda dek esternya.


1.5kg. Agak berat bagi sesikat pisang.

Selepas ini kami akan ke KLIA dan berbuka di sana. Ada praktikal Bahasa Arab sambil-sambil menghantar budak-budak Yayasan Pahang yang akan berterbangan ke Mesir sebulan lebih awal dari kami.

Aku membeli kuih sayur yang hanya ada pada hari Isnin sebelum aku kempunan seminggu lamanya. Membeli roti kebab. Ternampak air kelapa laut.

Tapi Idayu kata air mata kucing sedap. Boleh percaya ke taste mak cik ni? Tak pe, kita cuba test.

Beg kertas aku dah berat berisi makanan.

Woi, kau biar betul. Nak bawak pisang pergi air port ke?
Wallahi, ana bigad.
Buat lawak...

Aku merenung pisang yang mengeluarkan godaan esternya. Hmm, boleh habis ke?

Tak pe la, nanti aku letak dalam beg kertas yang elok sikit. Bagi dekat Akmal.

---

Roti kebab aku habiskan. Kuih sayur aku kongsi dengan Tasnim. (Walaupun harganya RM1, ia amat mengenyangkan.)

Nak tahu? Aku sedikit berdendam dengan air mata kucing itu. Sudah lah tertumpah sedikit dalam beg kertas ku, ianya mengeluarkan ester yang ganjil dan rasanya pun ganjil juga.

Lain kali, aku takkan beli air mata kucing lagi. Taste Idayu sememangnya ada problem.

Aku beli Dinner Plate KFC. Tapau untuk sahur nanti.

Beg kertas aku dah buang. Aku pergi ke kedai majalah. Beli beg kertas dekat situ.

RM6.90. Reasonable la tu, considering the place itself.

Aku letak pisang dan ayam-ayam aku. Dan aku kelek beg itu sambil menunggu budak Yayasan Pahang.

“Atiqah, ada apa dalam beg tu?” Azfa tanya.

“Ada pisang. Dan ayam.”

“Pisang??” Dia tersengih, bertanya penuh keraguan.

“Wallahi, ana bigad.” Muka aku serius.

“Okay la, saya percaya.” Dia ketawa.

“Nak tengok?”

“Nak.”

Dan aku buka plastic KFC, menampakkkan isinya yang kuning. Azfa ketawa.

“Kenapa bawa pisang?”

“Sebenarnya saya nak makan, tapi saya dah kenyang. Ingat nak bagi Akmal.” Aku sengih, Azfa ketawa. “Sorry la, perangai tak berapa betul kebelakangan ni. Jom makan.”

Azfa amik satu. Aku jaja pisang aku dari seorang budak perempuan MEP ke seorang yang lain. Aku mesti kelihatan amat lucu, tapi aku kesah apa?

Pisang itu amat manis. Sedap. Isinya mantap. Sedikit keras, tapi kami semua ada gigi dan gusi yang masih segar lagi, so no hal.

Aku makan satu je. Dan pisang aku pun habis.

“Terima kasih, Atiqah.” Nadiah asyik mengulangi tiga perkataan tersebut. Aku tahu la nama aku sedap, kak. “Beli sendiri ke?”

“Ye.”

“Beli dekat sini?”

“Akak, mana ada orang jual pisang dekat KLIA.” Aku ketawa. “Beli dekat bazaar tadi.”

Pisang aku dah habis. Aku lapar balik. Mana nak cari pisang lagi?

Gi jumpa budak-budak Yayasan Pahang dulu la.

Berjalan. Berhenti. Tenung kelompok budak-budak MEP yang bersepah-sepah depan kaunter H. Apa yang aku nak buat sebenarnya, eh?

Yayasan Pahang... Akmal...

Eh! Ambil gambar MT Mesir!

24 Ogos: Kambing on a Sunday

Gambar hiasan. Tiada kaitan dengan hidup mati aku.

Selepas Subuh, aku naik bosan. Or macam si kecil Ikbal Hariz kata, puah.

Ulang-alik dari bilik ke sink. Hish. Aku heret Tasnim ke taman. “Jom lah, kita gi jogging! Ajak la orang lain jugak!”

Nik ajak Nadhrah, Umairah dan Khadijah. Mantap. Aku minta dia pesan ke Umai suruh bawak kamera sekali.

Aku tengok cermin. Muka dah basuh, gigi dah gosok. Apa lagi belum? Oh ya. Mandi.

Mana ada orang mandi before jogging, kan? Gasak r. Aku pakai tudung and saut sweater over my short-sleeved France black tee.

Turun bawah. Tunggu Khadijah. Kami bergambar sebentar.

Sampai di taman. Aku malas lari. Budak-budak ni humban handphone atas aku. Aku jalan keliling taman tiga kali, berlari jugak in between. Poket dan tangan aku sarat dengan handphone.
Aku perasan ada budak yang tengok aku semacam je. Tak kesah la.

Kami stop di gelanggang skaters. Aku letak barang. Pandang gelanggang dan sengih.

Aku berlari dari satu hujung ke satu hujung. Sampai top dia. Steady... kasut getah aku licin gak. Aku gelongsor turun, full momentum atas lutut.

Terduduk atas court. Ketawa. Berdiri dan sapu lutut.

Rasa amat puas.

“Ya Rabbi...” Khadijah cakap.

“Best. Rasa cam budak.” Aku tersengih lebar.

“Tau tak pe.” Yang lain ketawa je.

Kami buat senam robik dan Pocho-pocho. Nadhrah pasang muzik.

Sambil-sambil tu kami kutuk MT lelaki. Muhammad, sorry deh. Umairah start.

Kami berjalan pulang. Diorang ajak gi breakfast. “La... yang pergi bakar kalori tadi tu, semata-mata nak isi balik la ye?”

“Apa lagi?” Kami ketawa.

Jogging tadi adalah rehat last aku. Kene sambung balik IFF yang dah seminggu aku tinggalkan ke Akmal dan Khadijah sementara aku berfoya-foya di BTN.

Call Puan Umi. Dia tanya pasal BTN. “Mantap je.”

Dia kata, dia tak call aku awal-awal sebab nak bagi aku rehat. Aku ketawa. Baik kan, lecturer-lecturer INTEC?

So tugasan disambung kembali. Aku tukar note on my handphone dari ‘Choleric no more’ to ‘Phlegmatic no more’.

Habis breakfast di Wira Sejati jam 10 pagi. Aku mengambil laptop dan sambung buat kerja di tempat Pak Guard.

Bincang dengan Khadijah pasal IFF. Settled sikit. Baru je nak call Akmal, dia dan Asyraf lalu. Macam tahu-tahu je. Aku suruh dia panggil semua yang terlibat masuk meeting pukul 12.01. Pukul 3 aku kene pergi shopping ngan Puan Umi.

“Saya maybe tak masuk meeting kot. Family datang. Saya dah bagitau hampir sumer ke Khadijah.”

“Pergi entertain family tu.” Aku sengih.

Pukul 11. Khadijah naik ke atas untuk mandi. Dia suruh aku naik atas jugak, tapi aku stayed back untuk settlekan refinement.

Aku call Papa. Dalam pukul 12 Papa and the gang sampai Shah Alam.

Aku tersengih. Ada chance aku lari dari meeting.

Terhenti sejenak. Leh caya ke diorang ni? Seminggu aku minta diorang carikan anak buah untuk unit aku, tu pun nak kene tunggu aku balik. Aish.

Hujan rintik. Aku simpan laptop. Nampak DAF 6565 parking dekat ngan Rafi Bistro.

Happy! Lari jumpa diorang.

Ternampak Akmal. Lari keluar jumpa dia sekejap. Maklumkan dia apa yang aku perlukan untuk IFF meeting kali ni dan maklumkan pasal family aku datang.

“Dah, dah. Pergi.” Tersengih menghalau aku.

Aku ketawa penuh penghargaan.

Kami brunch di Bistro. Sejam kemudian, diorang bertolak meneruskan perjalanan back to Kelantan.

Mama bagi aku lima dodol kecil, empat tart telur, tiga tin susu Dutch Lady dan satu bungkus kerepek.

Wah!

Meeting dah lama tamat. Aku call Akmal. “Sudah la tu. Pergi entertain family tu.”

“Pak cik, diorang dah balik la.”

Akhirnya pada hari itu, Atiqah mandi pagi jam 1.15 petang. Tahniah, kambing.

Merenung Lembu di Jalanan

It is now 4.13 am. I don't know which crazy bug bit me, but I've been awake since I woke up at 12. My brain aches.

I apologize to anyone who had waited for an update and I offer no excuses for such delay. It has been a very hectic life, though I managed to write snippets of it in the Notepad day by day. Just waiting to upload it, that's it.

Sounds like a lot of work. I'm reverting to my Phlegmatic self right now, and a lot of pushes need to be done before I get up and get going.

I understand the frustration of a hectic life, that's why I take privilege in staying up late and savouring the quietness and the tranquility of the pitch dark night. Let me relax and loosen up for a while. I suppose I deserve my break.

Tomorrow's another day of work. I've to purchase stuffs for IFF, finish my assignments, gear up for a visit from Papa and the gang and try to make room for ABC with Kak Aini.

Wondering why I didn't finish my assignment today? Well, it's my break, remember? Who in their right mind will finish assignment on break day?

Well, I used to a couple of weeks ago. When I was Choleric Atiqah. Now I'm Phlegmatic Atiqah. Hoho.

p/s: Starting to be annoyed with my too-relaxed self. This post is pure crap. I'll have it deleted soon.

Hari Rehat Para Pejuang

Today is Sunday. My last weekend for this week.

I'm staring at the park outside Kolej Cemara. People are jogging, some walking, and a father is teaching his son the exquisite art of playing badminton.

Such lovely day. I should be joining them.

Instead, I'm sitting at Cemara Cafe with another three; the Pak Cik and Mak Cik Cafe and Raziq, waiting for my laundry to finish.

I've just finished typing the paperwork for Salam Wida' and am struggling to finish the alterations made to our MEP Dinner's tentative.

At 9 a.m sharp, I should be waiting for Puan Umi at the entrance of our college. She'll be picking seven of us up to go to her house to practice cooking for our upcoming IFF. I'm not sure whether I can make it on time or not. I still need to wait for my laundry, finish the tedious paperwork and bathe.

Have I told you how wasted I am now? About my puking in the sink this morning? No? Well, I won't say so, then.

A lot pitied me, you know. Most prominent worriers are guys, which embarrass me quite. Akmal told me not to come to Puan Umi's house and rest instead; I had a hell of a week with their absence.

I declined him. He wasn't being rational with that suggestion. I have to go; I'm in-charge of the food for IFF!

He succumbed afterwards, after I replied his sms with, "I'm still alive, and what doesn't kill us makes us tougher."

I'm a stubborn lass, am I not? I'll have my break at the BTN, no worries.

Asyraf sms-ed me earlier this morning regarding the flash presentation needed for our dinner. He was involved in last night's INPRO Closing Night march and also in-charge for the MPSI, UiTM Quality Day and MEP dinner's performances.

He deserves a break. So I told him to hold it down first. I am kind, am I not? I should be kind to myself, too.

Have a happy day, everyone.

p/s: I slept on the floor last night, which was brilliant at first (I woke up real early). Now my back hurts.

Modest 18

10.45 p.m.

Atiqah and Hazirah were revising Chemistry. Atiqah's head dropped to the table.

"You wanted to sleep?"

"No, just lagging."

"Sleep on your bed. Your back's gonna ache."

It already is. "Wake me in 5 minutes, please."

11.03 p.m.

"Assalamualaikum! Atiqah!" Hamizah and Nuha came dashing in. Atiqah sat up straight and stared at the happy faces.

"Were you asleep?" Hamizah enquired, head tilted to the right.

Blinked. "Not supposed to. Ask Hazirah."

They chuckled, and proceeded to discuss on updates on the lecturer's t-shirts, upcoming MEP dinner and International Food Fair.

Atiqah remained awake. Am I forgetting something? She stared at her watch. 11.45 p.m. Nope, maybe not.

Nuha excused herself to go back home. Soon Hamizah followed, after piling her pictures of their Frisbee group into Atiqah's Haizen.

12.00 a.m.

Phone alerted her of an incoming message. From Kamilah.

Oh yeah, she smiled. I'm 18 already, hoho. How could I forget?

12.05 a.m.

Heard footsteps running outside the main door. Stood stirring her Nescafe + Milo and faced the door.

Nuha and Raihaana dashed in, squeezing between the frame as to enter the house first.

"Atiqah!" Both in unison. "Happy birthday!"

She chuckled.

"Here, from me." Nuha grinned her Noga Nany soft nouget.

She took it gratefully. "Haha, thank you." Perhaps a bit sheepishly.

"I've got something for you, too." Raihaana fished something out of her pocket.

"Same nouget?"

"Here." Atiqah held her hand out to accept Rai's identical nouget as Nuha's, albeit a bit squashed.

The four of them (don't forget Hazirah) laughed. Atiqah contemplated on her inability to make herself a card this year.

"Were we the first?" They asked.

"Fourth and fifth; you guys tied." Atiqah continued stirring her NestLo. "First was my muallimah. She was a month early."

"Second?" Raihaana asked after her fit of laughter.

"A classmate from SMI. A day early. Third was Kamilah. Exactly at 12."

"Wow." They nodded in recognition. "She's still here?"

"Sure, still in Damansara."

Maybe treat ourselves to a slice of cake this evening?
Sure. Oh, cannot. We've to review that place for our MEP dinner.
Oh yeah. Maybe next time.

"I'm fourth." Nuha said, facing Rai.

"No, I was earlier than you."

"I'm first."

"Me!"

Atiqah stared in amusement. A second message entered her inbox. Fatimah. She smiled gratefully.

"You guys were spoiling our surprise for her." Hazirah said, still seated facing her Chemistry notes. "We housemates planned to feign forgetfulness."

Third message that night entered. Along's. Her grin widened.

Nuha and Raihaana laughed. Atiqah remained stirring, contend with amusing herself at people's rememberence of her birthday. They chatted.

12.15 p.m.

Nuha and Rai excused themselves from the not-so-homey house with a packet of sira-ed keropok flown in directly from Kelantan. Atiqah grabbed her handphone to reply the birthday wishes with deliberate care.

Typed the entry for a message to Mama. All of a sudden, the handphone blanked itself. Battery flat. Inwardly she groaned.

25 July: Frisbee in Midst of Azan

We're having our INTEC INPRO right now and I've just finished my fair share of Frisbee with the girls. It was great fun!

We've never played Frisbee before, and lucky for us Abang Hafiz (Master Pocho-Pocho), an ADFP senior taught us our backhand during our first official practice day. After him, Kak Nadia, Kak Ili and Kak Bella (Nabila) from AL trained us for two evenings straight.

We've got great seniors, haven't we?

First it was MEP girls versus ADFP/ACTP girls. 3-2. Not bad for underdogs.

Second was MEP girls versus AL seniors who taught us. The match was fun and everyone was being a good sport.

1-6. It was masters against amateurs. I'm proud of our one score, though.

It's a good thing I'm into sports at INTEC. It's the only way to meet and greet seniors, other than say Assalamualaikum during bumps at the crowded sughoyyir-awi surau.

There is another reason why I heart those seniors of mine.

Kak Bella was among the game officers. Right before the Asar azan commence, she hailed through the hailer. "Stop the game now! Azan, azan! Everyone, stop!"

So we did. I smiled and sat quietly. Though the Chinese ADFP/ACTP students and their Malay teacher on my right did not.

Nor did some of the Russian male players in the middle of the field.

Form afar, I can see Kak Bella with her finger on her lips reprimanding the ignorant Malay boys. They shut up afterwards, though. I was looking forward to seeing their marks got deducted.

Automatically we said our prayers after the azan ended. Immediately afterwards, Kak Bella sounded the alarm for us to resume playing.

The Russian boys were still with their doa. "Relaks r, kak! Kami tengah baca doa ni!"

Dude, so slow. We rolled our eyes in unison.

The girls stayed back to watch MEP guys playing against ALG. I've to rush back to college; my futsal training starts at 5.15. Our match is tomorrow! Wah!

p/s: The end result for girls was AL first, followed by MEP and ADFP/ACTP.

MEP guys got third out of six. Not bad, not bad at all. Currently MEP is at number three, compared to last year's abysmal six. Do wish us the best in your prayers.

We got the M!
We got the E!
We got the P!
We got the M E P!
Takbir!
ALLAHUAKBAR!
-MEP girls' Frisbee chant-

Marriage Woes

Today, my diligent self rose early, made the bed, took a 40-minute bath (crazy) and washed yesterday's clothes.

After that, I walked to Masjid Al-Hidayah in the middle of the crowd for our Latihan Nuqaba' 2 under the morning rain.

The program was comprehensive and left me thinking about a lot of things. We discussed on the practicality of dai'e in dealing with mad'u during one-on-one approach.

There were two slots. The first one lacked momentum on my part with my notebook to testify on my nodding off once in a while during the ustaz's speech.

Kak Khansa' on my right kept shoving me candies and massaging my arm. I'm sure my inner self was doing that on purpose just to get the special treatment.

The second slot was fun. Kak Khansa' and Akh Dhany presented their Dakwah Fardhiyah di Lapangan and it was real practical. I'm glittering with enthusiasm to get this DF going already.

I met Fatah Ismail there. He still retain his smug look and bushy hair.

"Kata pergi Mesir."

"Persediaan 3 bulan dekat INTEC dulu."

"Oh." He broke into a huge grin. "Nampak gemuk."

"Kurang ajar." I smirked.

Kak Aniisah gave me this book, 'Aku Terima Nikahnya' by Hasrizal Abdul Jamil. I've finished reading the book and it is very illuminating. It put out my intention to coax my brother into marrying before I fly to Cairo.

And it makes me wonder whether marrying during fourth year of study is a good idea or a cathasthrope.

*shrugs* Let's bother ourselves with that question once I have someone to marry with.

Buddy System Closing Night

Last night was the closing night for Buddy System Program and each block had to send a team of performers for the Performance Competition.

My housemate Idayu was one of them and she had been pestering me for a total of five minutes last week that I just have to cave in.

You would, too, if you saw what she did to coax me into joining.

"Ala, Atiqah," she advanced towards me contentedly minding my own business.

"Jom la join."

"Jangan datang dekat." I frowned.

"Atiqah, join la." She started that intimidating smile of her.

"Main jauh-jauh, orang kata!"

"Atiqah, join la."

"Tak nak! Ana masyghulah!"

"Atiqah, join la~"

"Tak nak! Idayu! Lepas! ARGH! Lepas! Main jauh-jauh!"

"Atiqah, join la. Dua orang lagi tak nak. Kita dua join sekali la."

"Idayu! Let go! Geli wei!"

"Join la."

"Okay, okay! Saya join! Now lepas!"

And I was free, but I lost. I started to think how lucky those two sniggering housemates (Tasnim and Hazirah) of mine were.

So you had me, one green-clad girl frowning at the prospect of her singing 'Hijau' along with ten others.

I can't believe I've landed myself into this.

Like, I know my voice is sweet but singing is just not my thing. But it's too late to back off now; I'll just dishearten the team.

So last night, we walked to Dataran Cemara and sat on the dusty ground, waiting for our turn.

I commited into memory the small crowd gathering in front of the stage. No borderline between the female and male. They squeezed among themselves, being comfortable with talking and sitting next to each other.

How sweet. If only they're married.

First block presented. I watched wearily as three white tudung-clad girls and another three free-hair climbed upon the stage claiming their mauduq as 'We're All in This Together'.

The music started.

The girls danced.

The crowd cheered. The males whistled.

I automatically stared at the ground, aghast. I need to get out of there before I wrench off any of their heads.

So I stood up, headed towards our Head of Block and said, "I'm sorry, I'm out."

And like the wind, I walked away.

Perhaps it wasn't wise at all. My departure conveyed no message whatsoever, but I just couldn't stand being there.

INTEC's over-social life is disheartening. My fragile heart just couldn't let me stare and so nothing. There is no such thing as being okay with things that should never be considered okay.

Welcome to the real world, Atiqah.

p/s: I came back to watch our block's performance. Then I went for dinner with the crowd. I'll write about it soon.

There're Lazy Days Around, Too

Today is a quiet day. I woke up after Subuh at 9 and took a pleasantly slow cold shower. Had my breakfast of hot milo and three biscuits.

Now I'm staring at Haizen, unsure whether to start my Ophthalmology in Islam assignment or the Lipid Diffusion.

Finally I settled on reading Fanfiction.net and make-uping my Friendster profile.

I am such a deliberate genius, aren't I?

I have a date with Dr. House at 12 pm. I suppose I better get going now. Have a nice weekend, minna-san.

A few minutes later...

I'm back. Quite frustrated, really, but nothing I can't hide behind my enchanting smile. He didn't turn up.

I should wait for him, probably.

Now I'm back in front of Haizen, sipping milk as loudly as I can. Not that there are any etiquette police around.

Milk is good to keep my hormones in check.

I've checked my calendar and the nearest assignment dateline is for my Lipid Diffusion presentation. I should bid you fellows adieu and start head-long into it, shouldn't I?

Tasnim is having her RM4 lunch and she's coaxing me into buying mine now. I'm on a diet actually, which consisted of milo and biscuits for breakfast, low-fat milk for lunch, tea for tea and nasi for dinner.

And probably throw in some keropok in between. If I can find decend one laying around. Shah Alam's keropok aren't as delish as Kelantan's or Terengganu's.

Now that reminds me. A classmate of mine has gone back to Terengganu. Let see if he could handle some more keropok in his luggage.

I've rambled, I know. I should get my footing now.

Again, have a nice weekend, minna-san.