Posterior duodenal ulcer can invade gastroduodenal artery and causes massive bleed enough to make a man collapse

Dad was telling us the story of one houseman who was extended for knowledge reason ("she didn't remember the doses" and I was stricken. Come on we have Frank Shann, don't we?) in his workplace and she cried in front of him because she didn't want to be extended. Flabbergasted dad who was with his specialist asked the lady specialist to handle her.

Turned out the houseman didn't want to be extended because of one particular MO who kept on scolding them for no good reason. The specialists didn't know of this and thus will start digging.

"Is the MO a he or a she?" I asked.

"She," dad replied.

"Of course. Is she married?"

"No."

"I know it!"

"Unmarried ladies are always so bitter," or so mom said. Then she turned to me. "Kakngah hurry and get married."

"Okay I'll go tackle someone now." I answered mom with a straight face. "I have eyes on one MO but he's in Sarawak now. My HO friend said the MO likes me."

"Don't tackle anyone. If he likes you, just tell him to ask his mom to come meet me."

"Okay I'll do that tomorrow."

Hahaha that was too easy. I wonder what's stopping me from really doing this.

140416 - Postcall esok off lusa start Ortho, so today is Last Day Medical

Dalam dewan lepas habis CME, Dr. Fazirah called me out.

"Atiqah! Awak anak Dr. Hanifah ye?"

"Haah," I grinned. Exit meeting is over so now all my bosses should know.

"Mesti awak bagitahu ayah awak yang saya marah awak kan?"

"Tak de lah. Takde pun saya kena marah. Dr. Fazirah antara specialist yang paling saya hargai. Thank you a lot doctor."

She grinned and told Dr. Hayati about me and how I don't look like my father. I stuck around grinning.

"Oo awak la anak Dr. Hanifah?" Dr. Hayati asked me curiously. Haha this felt weird. But it felt good that my bosses know me as me before as my dad's daughter.

"Azerin! Kau tahu tak budak ni anak Dr. Hanifah?"

"Tahuu." I met Dr. Azerin with dad already two weeks ago. He called me dik bwahaha.

"Cuba kau tengok spec budak ni."

"Kenapa dengan spec budak ni?"

I grinned at Dr. Azerin. He stared at me not getting it. Dr. Fazirah pushed her finger through my frame and I laughed.

"Takde lense!"

"Budak ni! Aku nak tanya Zainon kenapa anak dia pelik sangat!"

"Hahahahah."

---

Outside the hall I met Dr. Afnan and Dr. Rusydan. We had our kuih and chit chat a bit. Dr. Afnan's first question to me was

"Atiqah bila awak nak kahwin?"

"Okay esok."

If he has a calon just name him stat! Hahahaha. When I see him and next time and if he still ask me so, I'm fishing out a name from him.

---

When I was punching out I saw Dr. Wazi and Dr. Zul Amali so I waited for them. They walked pass me and I greeted them.

"Boss harini hari last saya dalam Medical."

"Bila nak belanja makan?" Dr. Zul asked.

"Belanja tau Tiqah."

"Haha jom la bila-bila."

"Nanti call saya ya."

"Baik bos!" I grinned. I wonder if it is related to his thesis. Boss Aizat my favourite Surgery registrar does that.

---

Yesterday I observed ICD insertion done by Dr. Mansor, Dr. Wazi and Dr. Faiz with Dr. Sapawi observing. Dr. Mansor unscrubbed first and closing was done by the fellows. I asked Dr. Wazi questions and he deflected back!

"Kau ni patut amik Plastic Surgery la Tiqah."

"Plastic detail sangat. Saya tak minat halus-halus."

"Kau kan detail. Tanya banyak."

Dr. Faiz laughed.

"Kau memang ada gaya boleh berjaya la. Aku tahu."

"Ameeeeen terima kasih boss. Saya nak quote boss."

3 days babysitting and finally I feel like a girl

When we parted, the guys towards Terminal 2 and I for Terminal 1, Dr. Helmi was the only one who waited to say bye. My said favourite brother knew and trusted my independence too well to show any concern, damn that guy.

"Hi hi bye bye."

I grinned brightest at him. "Bye Dr. Helmi. Jumpa lagi, jaga diri." 

"Jumpa lagi dekat Kelantan."

"Okay." I wondered why he said Kelantan, he is in fact working in Besut. I turned around to leave but he called me out.

"Okay ni Atiqah?" Complete with a thumb's up.

I smiled sincerely. Dr. Helmi is as gentlemanly as I ever remember him, and I'm grateful for a person who treats me like a girl when the rest are doing what boys do. He's a good mushrif.

"Okay." I smiled reassuringly.

"Ada nak apa-apa?"

"Takde. Terima kasih doktor."

I turned my back on him. And then he called me the second time.

"Kat sini pun boleh keluar." He pointed to where Luqman, V and Omar exited the train platform. "Keluar sekali la. Ke nak split dah?"

I grinned and walked with him. "Jalan sekali la selagi boleh."

I'm grateful I did. We sorted out Omar's ticket and turned out we were heading for the same terminal. He's a reliable MO so I found it rather cute that he's somewhat dependent when it comes to travelling. "Saya jaga Dr. Omar," I told him proudly. Bwahaha. We walked and chatted together until immigration, which he let me go first because my flight was earlier than him and he expected me to run off first. I waited for him after I scanned where our gates were.

"Gate saya C19, yours D35." I jotted down mine on my ticket and thought about jotting down on his, but I was afraid my concern would offend him. I've always acted as the self-appointed leader when I go travelling with the girls, so I cannot help but look out for my travelmates when I go with these guys, plus the fact some are behaving like brats. But Omar is still a guy, older than me some more, and there's just him and I at that moment and somehow he showed maturity in our conversation, I don't want to bruise his ego.

So I didn't. I gave him a chocolate souvenir for him to pass to Dr. Ang his housemate who has been looking out for him throughout their stay in Kuching yet he forgot to buy anything for the guy, goodness. I smiled at him and parted.

"D35 is that way." I pointed towards the opposite direction to where I was going. "Jaga diri Dr. Omar, jangan sesat ye. Jumpa lagi. Kahwin jemput."

He barely got to say anything back because I already turned around and leave. A few steps later I turned around and scanned the crowd. I couldn't find him. I hope he would be okay. And I regretted rushing off because my gate just opened and I have time to properly say whatever else I wanted to say and more importantly to listen to what he has to say. I don't know when I'm going to meet him again. And there's the Famous Amos he wanted to eat on the train in my bag that I forgot about. Why did I rush in the first place?

I got to my gate with time to spare so I went on Facebook on the Free Internet computers stationed at the waiting area. Sent messages to mom and my aunt to let them know of my status. I wondered how Omar was doing, the guy acknowledged he is prone to getting lost. So I added him on Facebook and monitored whether he approves me or not.

Five minutes later, he did. None of us has wifi on our phone so that means he should already be safely around his gate with time to spare. Good for him. Fi hifzillah Dr. Omar.

I then deleted him off my friend list. Bwahaha. Let Dr. Aizat be the only MO I befriend on Facebook.

Confession of an irritated sister

Luqman was asking me where Vicky was.

"Eh where's your brother?"

I looked at that guy unperturbed. Saje je kan. "Who, you?"

He snorted and grinned but didn't stop provoking me. "No, your beloved brother."

"You mean you?"

He sighed a grin but didn't stop trying. Was he flattered? I wasn't lying. I grinned back, this was fun. "Your favourite brother."

"You laa."

"Okay la your other brother.."

Only then did I turned around to locate where Vicky was, with him muttering behind me "Your hairy brother."

Omar didn't help. "Your future-"

I glared him and he stopped. I goaded him. "My what? Say it."

He gave me his hesitant grin. I showed him I wasn't impressed. "Complete your sentence Omar. You're a man."

That ticked the guy. "Your future husband."

I looked at him, half-tempted to answer him like I did Luqman, but I don't joke about things like that. Promise of marriage in Islam is easily binding. I turned to Luqman.

"I thought you know me better than this." Because this was all his fault. 

During lunch on Saturday Omar asked me about this, he said Luqman started this hearsay of Vicky considering reverting to marry me and of course I took the conversation seriously because I would not interact with Vicky as I have been now if he starts to think of me more than just a sister/protege. And why am I being the sacrificial lamb here?! We continued on the conversation until Vicky came to sit across me at the table and noticed I was ticked. 

"What's upsetting you? Did Omar propose?"

"If he was, it would be easier to deal with." I noticed out of the corner of my eye something changed in Omar's expression. "No, he's talking about other much more serious thing." I turned to look at him so that he would elaborate, but Omar wouldn't talk further. Not speaking is the root of all evil, let's settle this once and for all. So of course I goaded him. 

"You're a man, men talk to each other."

"I was proposing her for you," Omar said to Vicky and turned to me. "See. I said it."

"Good for you. You're the man, Omar."

"No la, she's like a sister," Vicky said.

"See?" I told you, Omar.

End of flashback and back to Stupid Luqman. I wanted to stomp on his shoes.

"Yes, sorry. Bad joke." Good that he apologized. I would have to ignore him for three days if he didn't. 

Teringat **** la pulak hahah

Yesterday one of the Anaes MO was looking at me familiarly. I don't recall knowing him on a personal level so I was curious what that look and smirk meant. But I was easily distracted by my work that day.

Later in the night I was reviewing my patient during oncall. Said Anaes came to review one of my patients. He was chatting with the staff nurse but then I heard his attention turned to me.

"Tu houseman ke?"

"Haah," the nurse replied. I turned around to face him, perhaps there was something pertaining to my patient.

"Awak yang pergi mengail haritu kan?" He grinned.

Oh. Ohh now I know where I met him. He was the MO Anaes who lived nearby our fishing spot and came over in his car with his wife to greet (or snide) us. Dr. Mustaq introduced me to him as "anak papa" which I countered with my own "saya Atiqah, sekarang ni HO Medical." He then tried to hook me up with Dr. Mustaq and I remember turning to Luqman who stood on my left at that time and said "Should I tell them I'm gay?"

I don't remember his name, but I remember he is as sengal as he is acting now.

"Haah," I grinned back in recognition.

"Tak pergi mengail dah ke?"

"Luqman dah tak ajak."

"Jiran tak ajak mengail dah?"

I was going to reply "sebab Omar dah takde sini kot" but thought better of it. Then the doorbell rang and I saw Dr. Wazi my specialist standing in front of the door. I excitedly stood up to start our rounds.

Dr. Wazi is a funny guy. Cardiology fellow in training, Dr. Sapawi's protege. I was asking him how he ended up in Cardiology to which he replied "pakcik kau la tarik aku" and I replied "dia bukan pakcik saya, saya makcik dia."

"Eh? Kau anak saudara Dr. Sapawi ke?"

"Eh tak. Saya pangkat mak saudara dia. Doktor tak tahu?"

"Tak. Aku tembak je kata dia pakcik kau."

Oh God secret's out.

He said I looked like his sister-in-law, spot on style. Even missed call my number and I'm expecting him to send her picture to me one of these days haha. And the best thing is that he calls me "Tiqah". I feel like I've done a good job here so far.

---

Finished my round at CRW, I went over to Yeap at CCU. The MO's name is Dr. Hisyam (asked the nurses lol) and he was offhandedly discussing one case needing SLEDD.

"Ke macam mana awak rasa?" Suddenly he asked for my opinion.

I always think at one point we have to save our resource and let go. But I told him "let the Nephrologists decide."

"Tok soh banyok kecek la gi ngail tu." He was trying to be funny on his way up to Temenggong.

"Jom la pergi next time!" I called to his back with a grin.

In which Haru complains like a specialist, apparently

I partially wrote this on Facebook but my friends commented I should be an MO at a KK "baru tahu" and one friend counselled me on the need to be humble. So I deleted the post. It's just.. when you put a standard to your job, you know what a job well-done is. You cannot refer by means of dumping the problem to someone else. Referring with a provisional diagnosis in the least, that's what I've been trained to do.

Today I met Dr. Afnan to get his signature for my logbook. He said he'll meet us again in our different department, chuckling at what I assume at the prospect of receiving referrals from us. I told him I'll make sure I'll make a "referral berkualiti" when I call. He said most HOs do a good job, but it's our MO/specialist who order to refer this and that, "tak boleh salahkan HO jugak."

I didn't tell him, but I don't want to be the kind of person who does things just because bosses tell me to when I know better. So I told him to pray we become MOs and specialists who refer appropriately and accordingly.

He chuckled. "Doakan la untuk kami MO-MO kronik ni."

LOL. He's taking MRCS Part 1 this June, RM3500. He said if he fails he'll start selling nasi lemak.

Me: RM3500? Berapa banyak nasi lemak tu? Haha.

Anyway, to my story today.

Last night oncall I had a Red Zone admission for non ST elevation myocardial infarction. Previously no known medical illness but goiter for one year and haemorrhoid since 40 years. Patient had with him a referral letter from one of our GH with no address to with him. I opened it and frowned.

The typed out letter sucks. No address to! Written in notes, no clerking of hypo or hyperthyroid symptoms, no documentation of the swelling examination, no supportive examination! Downright "referring for goiter for further management."

I flipped the letter to see which HO wrote such an abysmal referral. It was signed by a UD44!! God an MO! What a disgrace! Ni dari specialist hospital! Kalau dari KK ceruk manentah boleh kira la tapi Hospital P!! MO somemore wthell. So I ranted on Twitter hahaha.

The next morning I presented the new case to our Cardiology fellow Dr. Wazi. Terlepas cakap to him "diorang refer sapentah for goiter for investigation tapi referral tak berkualiti."

Dr. Wazi looked at me and said "Kau ni kutuk referral orang macam kau level specialist dah ye."

Ops. "Haha tapi ye la, tak clerk properly hypo hyperthyroid symptoms, no supportive investigations." I looked back at him. "Saya plan nak bersara sebagai consultant.

"Bagus. Consultant Medical la kan?"

"Tak. Surgery."

"Kau tak sesuai. Kau kena amik Medical."

Boss don't pray for stuffs like that. I want to leave Medical asap.

Branula

Paling stress kerja HO bila kena pasang branula for vvvvvvvip, some more patient is alert and conscious. Me berpeluh, istighfar mohon dosa selama ni tak menjadi hijab kejayaan pasang branula in one attempt for this patient. Alhamdulillah!

Me sambil kemas2: Terima kasih doktor.
Patient: Terima kasih doktor.

Me sengih segan consultant panggil aku doktor. Hewhewhew.

Adult Atiqah

So the Surgery family has been borderline pestering me about the Singapore Trauma Conference and I finally succumbed to peer pressure and making it a reality. Okay, actually I'll have more regrets not going then going. Mom and dad said it's up to me whether to go or not to go and I already told them I'll be meeting my MOs there.

Bureaucracy is a pain but as an adult (bwahaha) I have endured and shall present to you what I have done so far. And because tomorrow is my off day and as an adult I will use it productively.

1- I have registered and the organiser is saving me a spot. How kind.

2- I paid using my saving account 4 days ago but only today realised the amount was credited back. So I borrowed my dad's card (I cancelled my supplementary card already) and paid via Visa just now.

3- I have met my Ortho HOD (during the event I am hopefully an Ortho HO) and he has signed my borang cuti! Weehu! Three days yeaaaha! Friday for travel and I want to squeeze in meeting the cousins, Saturday and Sunday conference day!

4- Mr. Mad asked me to meet Miss Maz who is the HO coordinator for Ortho. She was in OT today so I'm using my off day tomorrow to go meet her in her clinic, introduce myself as her soon-HO, arrange my tagging period properly and hopefully not leave a bad first impression as the "HO yang minta cuti sebelum start posting".

5- I have bought the tickets! Cost me a good RM4xx but what's money compared to this opportunity. To be frank half of me just wanted to hang out with these people. The other half is excited for the topics and to ziarah The Li Family, haha. And a tiny bit is beaten by all these forms filling. I have yet to arrange for accommodation.. Remind me to finalise it tomorrow.

6- Which is why I wish to have lunch with Dr. Vicky and exchange plans. But I bet he rarely eats nowadays and he'll be in the OT and invite me in. I will remember to bring my OT clothes ready but I will hesitate to join in..

7- .. because despite my list of adult things to do, I have my exit viva on Tuesday and should study for it. Kata nak lepas masuk Ortho, haha... Not funny Atiqah, don't laugh. Study la budak ni.

8- Also I'm going to the lawyer's office tomorrow to sign papers on the house loan.

9- Then to the bank to apply for a credit card. I tried twice online then the stupid thing logged me out. I have no patience for inefficient process. If they tell me to fill the forms online I am going to exercise my right as a customer. Haha.

Okay. Next is study. I'm still not good at how to start OHA or Mixtard.

Aku doakan Hannan lulus viva Dr. Mat, ameen

Borak panjang dengan Hannan harini. Bincang isu semasa. Last2 Hannan kata

"Aku tak pernah nampak kau pakai baju kurung."

"Memang. Dekat Medical aku tak pakai baju kurung langsung. Masa Surgery rajin jugak, aku oncall postcall je pakai seluar."

"Sebab tu aku terus label kau budak perempuan yang macam manly."

Bengong Hannan hahahahaha. Argh argh apsal laa dia ni comel sangat rasa nak tampar.