Munirah

Our beloved Munirah our sister-in-law's younger sister passed away last night, bravely battled SLE. She had always been the smiley one since I met her in primary school, and in her final days she was always the one who smiled and us who cried..

I cried in my brief minute beside her in the ICU, barely muttering "Ika maafkan Muni, Muni maafkan Ika please" when it hit me what her bradycardia meant. I cried telling her mom to please call her brother home that same day instead of waiting for the next day. I cried while gently tightening the clothe wrapping around her face. That's all I was capable of. And I cried thinking what a devastating loss this is, praying may she continued to be loved by all creatures here and above. This is me, someone not even related by blood. I can't even begin to imagine what her nuclear family are feeling.

Allahumma please forgive her and her family, accept all her deeds, and grant her the grandest paradise with Your prophets and martyrs. Allahumma please grant her family strength and peace in this trying time. Allahumma please let us be gather again, allahumma ameen.

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Keep life simple

I always try to eat dinner at home because that's one of the time we gather. So I'll look forward to eat together once I get home after work. But lately mom's getting tired and this week she didn't cook much.

Today I was on OT duty and didn't have rice all day. Mom picked me up close to 6pm and suggested we go to HUSM and visit Munirah. I was a bit dejected, I needed to eat.

"Tak kisah la."

"Nak pergi ke tak?"

"Ikut la. Ika lapar sebenarnya."

"Mama tak masak pun lagi. Dah tahu lapar makan la sebelum balik."

Now that she said that, I guess I really am spoiled rotten. At work I have Pofin feeding me and at home I have mom. I always reminded myself when I was in Egypt that I myself am responsible for my own meals.

So we got home, I entered my room, put my bag down, passed mom by the door and said "Ika nak keluar."

And I went to Kubang Kerian and ordered food for myself. While waiting for my order to arrive, mom called.

"Pergi mana?"

"Ika keluar."

"Mama masak dah. Keluar pergi mana? Tak kata pun."

"Ika kata kan masa kat pintu tu."

"Pergi mana?"

Should I tell her the truth that I was hungry so I took up her suggestion to eat before coming home? "Keluar dengan kawan."

"Oh ok."

Of course I lied. And tomorrow onwards I'll drive to work. I'll wake up early and sacrifice my sleep for this. I'll be less spoiled.

my aging bro

nowadays commuting to the airport is the only time we meet. and luqman seems older nowadays. he's in a somber mood, feeling-old vibe, can't stand a single song Japanese, and always seems to be reminiscing.

"How long have you been in O&G?"

"I think I have about 40 days left."

"Time surely flies."

"I'm going to Anaes next."

"Final posting already?" he seemed surprised.

"Yeah."

"House officer becoming a medical officer.." in a lonely tone.

"It's almost two years already. You're getting old."

the last time he acted like an annoying teenager was when he entered my car, blasted the air-cond and radio volume max, synched his phone to my car so that he can play his techno music out loud, that was what, three four months ago?