I admire his eloquent speech. His brain and deductions. I find his unkept physique adorable. He was analysing crime and his fishing analogy reminds me how he envelopes himself in nature to calm his vivid thoughts down.
And I thought, how do you love such a guy?
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On an unrelated note, "frustrated" is the word I've been looking for these past few days. I want to share this feeling with someone because it is good to vent, but I also appreciate that it's only temporary relief before feeling stupid sinks in. My options are also limited to my parents or Umair, both of which don't match me psychologically and wouldn't know what to say. I don't feel my parents are approaching me correctly and admitting my frustration to Umair will only validate her own frustration. I have my cool demeanour to live up to.
Perhaps these two notes aren't as unrelated as I claimed.
I am also quicker to lose patience with human nowadays. I react by quietly fuming. It's not helping anything and perhaps facilitating their deterioration, and at the end all I can do is pray Allah gives me more patience and guide us (them!) to the right path.
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